Despite United States temperatures ranging from "obnoxiously cold" to "WTF this was supposed to be spring," last month was in fact the fourth-warmest March since 1880 globally, and the 349th-straight month of global temperatures above the 20th-century average for that month.
"But I was so cold!" you might be saying. "How can this be, Al Gore?" Apparently the answer involves the fact that there are other countries in the world besides the United States:
The red areas are those in which March was hotter than usual; it was an unusually warm month in Russia and northern Europe. Ban reindeer.