As the 2013 Masters gets underway, golf fans are gearing up for four days of Jim Nance’s hushed intonations about the majesty and otherworldly charms of Tiger Woods and Augusta National. But for many out there who are still high from two weeks of March Madness, the pace of golf on TV and all that whispering on air are a real buzzkill.

In 2009, Slate V found the solution: What would happen if basketball announcers called golf?