If commercial photographs of women eating salad (as first portrayed hilariously on the Hairpin and already countered with Buzzfeed's men eating fruit salad) tend to convey healthy, righteous fun—why, that woman can't possibly be depriving herself if she's laughing!—ads and stock images of women eating chocolate tend to convey pleasure of the bow-chicka-bow-wow variety. Chocolate equals sex. Current TV's Sarah Haskins has already noted: It's only normal to look like you're getting busy savoring that chocolate you're eating alone.
In the accompanying slide show, there's a woman about to eat a chocolate bar with a come-hither look in her green eyes. There's a close-up of a woman's wet lips as she moves a bonbon toward her mouth. Women eating chocolate tend to have tousled hair and heads thrown back in desire. Sometimes they look guilty, in a seductive sort of way. Sometimes they wear red negligees while clutching candies greedily. There's one in our collection that's just a close-up of a woman's torso with a chocolate bar tucked into the waist of her unbuttoned jean shorts. 'Nuff said.
They are usually just about to bite. They are beautiful, and they are hungry, and you just know they're going to eat the whole thing.
Click here for a slide show of women seductively eating chocolate.
TODAY IN SLATE
Smash and Grab
Will competitive Senate contests in Kansas and South Dakota lead to more late-breaking races in future elections?
Stop Panicking. America Is Now in Very Good Shape to Respond to the Ebola Crisis.
The 2014 Kansas City Royals Show the Value of Building a Mediocre Baseball Team
The GOP Won’t Win Any Black Votes With Its New “Willie Horton” Ad
Sleater-Kinney Was Once America’s Best Rock Band
Can it be again?
Forget Oculus Rift
This $25 cardboard box turns your phone into an incredibly fun virtual reality experience.