Digital Manners: Parents Never Come to The Door To Pick Up Their Kids From Our House—They Just Text.

Navigating the intersection of etiquette and technology.
March 13 2012 1:42 PM

Drive-By Texting (Transcript)

Parents never come to the door to pick up their kids from our house—they just text.

(Continued from Page 1)

Emily:  I have to say that when parents come and pick my daughter’s friends up, I do like to meet them once or so, but there are some parents who come in every time – and you will not believe how slow teenagers are at putting their shoes on. It’s like having kindergarteners. So you’re standing there, “Hey, how are you…” thinking, “Kids, please hurry up.”

Once you’ve already met, if you’re not pursuing a friendship, you’re not social friends, then when my daughter has a group over, usually it’s one by one the parents come, they send a text, the kid goes out the door and that’s just fine with everyone. But I do think that it is important to have established at least one or twice some face time.

Farhad:  I agree with that. I think that you should meet them at least once. I think expecting it more often or all the time, that’s too much.


Emily:  But Farhad, you’re the parent of a young child. I know, for me, now my daughter is a teenager so I’m not really making new friends out of the parents of her classmates even though she went to a new high school. But when she was little, a lot of my dearest friends now I met through my young daughter. To totally lose that would be really sad.

Farhad:  Yeah. But my son is not old enough to understand text, so it wouldn’t really work.

Emily:  Right. But I’m saying as he does get older. There is something really sweet about those years when you do make connections with other parents who are in the same situation you are.

Farhad, my bottom line is get my bottom up out of the car seat and, at least the first time, go to the door. I think the letter writer is right.

Farhad:  I agree with that. I just don’t think you should feel guilty if you don’t go all the time.

Emily: Send us your questions about shifting etiquette in the online age. Our address is

Farhad:  You can also join our Facebook page where we carry on the conversation throughout the week.  Go to

Emily:  And we’ll talk to you next time on Manners for the Digital Age.



Crying Rape

False rape accusations exist, and they are a serious problem.

Scotland Is Just the Beginning. Expect More Political Earthquakes in Europe.

I Bought the Huge iPhone. I’m Already Thinking of Returning It.

The Music Industry Is Ignoring Some of the Best Black Women Singing R&B

How Will You Carry Around Your Huge New iPhone? Apple Pants!

Medical Examiner

The Most Terrifying Thing About Ebola 

The disease threatens humanity by preying on humanity.


The Other Huxtable Effect

Thirty years ago, The Cosby Show gave us one of TV’s great feminists.

Lifetime Didn’t Find the Steubenville Rape Case Dramatic Enough. So They Added a Little Self-Immolation.

No, New York Times, Shonda Rhimes Is Not an “Angry Black Woman” 

Brow Beat
Sept. 19 2014 1:39 PM Shonda Rhimes Is Not an “Angry Black Woman,” New York Times. Neither Are Her Characters.
Sept. 19 2014 1:11 PM An Up-Close Look at the U.S.–Mexico Border
  News & Politics
Sept. 19 2014 9:15 PM Chris Christie, Better Than Ever
Sept. 19 2014 6:35 PM Pabst Blue Ribbon is Being Sold to the Russians, Was So Over Anyway
Inside Higher Ed
Sept. 19 2014 1:34 PM Empty Seats, Fewer Donors? College football isn’t attracting the audience it used to.
  Double X
The XX Factor
Sept. 19 2014 4:58 PM Steubenville Gets the Lifetime Treatment (And a Cheerleader Erupts Into Flames)
  Slate Plus
Slate Picks
Sept. 19 2014 12:00 PM What Happened at Slate This Week? The Slatest editor tells us to read well-informed skepticism, media criticism, and more.
Brow Beat
Sept. 19 2014 4:48 PM You Should Be Listening to Sbtrkt
Future Tense
Sept. 19 2014 6:31 PM The One Big Problem With the Enormous New iPhone
  Health & Science
Medical Examiner
Sept. 19 2014 5:09 PM Did America Get Fat by Drinking Diet Soda?   A high-profile study points the finger at artificial sweeteners.
Sports Nut
Sept. 18 2014 11:42 AM Grandmaster Clash One of the most amazing feats in chess history just happened, and no one noticed.