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FS: Welcome to MoneyMind, a podcast about money made exactly for you. I’m Faith Salie.

So you’re an Avid Consumer. And you’re in your 30s. You might be thinking, “That sounds bad!” But don’t worry. I’ve learned a lot lately about what it’s like to be an Avid Consumer in your 30s. And I’m here to share that information with you.

Let’s start with the “consumer” part. I went out and asked some Avid Consumers about their finances. Here’s what they had to say about money.

It’s everyday seems like one of those things where I have to talk myself out of buying something. But then somehow I always manage to.

I know it is very tempting to spend.

Basically what I know for sure is, it's not what you have in the moment, it's what you're willing to give up. And I have given up every dollar I own.

A lot of the emotions I have surrounding money are a lot of guilt lately.

FS: Here’s what I found out from these conversations. It’s not necessarily a bad thing to be an Avid Consumer. It just means that you like to see your money in action. You might be more likely to make an impulse purchase here and there. But you’re also more likely to make a risky investment -- which has the potential to pay off big.

I met one Avid Consumer named Monique. She’s just now thinking about making the switch from big spender to big investor. Here’s what she had to say about her finances.

Monique: I could definitely save more. That is definitely something I want to do, is save more. I see a macaroon shop that's open and I'm walking in buying $36 of macaroons that could've been in my savings account. I'll buy a coffee because I'm feeling coffeeish.

I can't account for what I'm buying.  It doesn't have any value where I can say, “Oh, I bought a Bugatti and now I can resell it and get my money back.” No it's not happening that way! So.

I feel like if i incorporate in my everyday life spending habits that are going to carry on, retirement is not going to be an issue, if I just focus on not spending.

FS: Okay, so what would financial experts have to say about Avid Consumers like you? And what advice would they have for people like Monique? I started with Jeff Rose, a certified financial planner, and the author of the site Good Financial Cents Dot Com. Yes, that is cents as in money. Jeff is an Avid Consumer himself, and he’s figured out how to make his financial behavior type work in his favor. I gave him a call.

Let's start with avid consumers. Okay. You were one!

Jeff Rose: Yes.

FS: You know, talking about Monique, she talks a lot about her feelings. You know she's feeling coffee as she is she says she gets angry with herself. What would you name as the emotions and anxieties that are tied up with avid consumers?

JR: Wow. What she was saying -- like you mentioned, she's feeling coffeeish, she's feeling this. So she's purely acting on just her what she's in the moment for. ‘I want it. I want it right now.’ And getting that immediate gratification from whatever that is.

And if you recognize that about yourself and your personality, you have to put in some sort of safety measure, some sort of protection on yourself to prevent you from going down that path of buying stuff.

FS: Ah, so what would that be?

JR: One way is carrying cash and only using cash and having only a predetermined amount of how much you're allowed to spend on yourself for those types of thing.

FS: Treat yourself kid. Right? Give yourself an allowance.

JR: You have to. You have to if you know that about yourself. You know, for those that are buying things online, I always - I always try to instill some sort of 72 hour window.

FS: Dude, 72 hours? Most people say 24.

JR: 72! I know.

FS: You’re tough, man.

JR: I was in the military. So that’s part of the regimen here.

FS: That’s what I try to do with chocolate but I can never make the 72 hours. But then again I was not in the military.

But let's talk about the other side of this though. What are the benefits and opportunities of falling into this behavior type?

JR: So the avid consumer that can, you know, say, live in the moment and enjoy, you know, some of those times where people maybe that are quote-unquote a ‘tightwad’ that, you know, they're not going to splurge a little bit and enjoy themselves - so I think you know there has to be some balance of enjoying that coffee, enjoying that macaroon, or whatever that is for yourself, and enjoying your life because accumulating wealth in a nest egg that you have millions of dollars that you don't spend any of it and then, you know, you pass away, then what do you save it for? What was the point? So you have to enjoy your life to some extent.

FS: What are the disadvantages or risks of being an avid consumer?

JR: The risks are waking up one day over the course of a very short amount of time and realizing, wow, you have over $20,000 of debt because of acting on the moment and splurging. You know, splurging once in a while is okay. Splurging once a day, two or three times a day, every single day, that's where you get into trouble.

FS: Jeff Rose says knowledge is power. Emma Johnson, another financial expert, says that financial wellness means all-around wellness. Emma is the author of the blog Wealthy Single Mommy Dot Com. This is what she had to say about Avid Consumers.

Emma Johnson: Being conscious of your money as just being conscious in your life.

It's just like any bad habit you're trying to correct. It's just going to take some tough love on yourself and get real with the facts. So, I mean, open all of those credit card bills. And you open all those medical bills and your student debt, and you really look at your paycheck, and you just get really freaking real with those numbers and look at them. And prepare yourself for the fact it's going to hurt. It's going to be ugly and you're going to have to look at some mistakes that you may have been making for a really long time and that's okay.

So then it's about looking at your goals and actually take action steps every single day to make it happen because now you're living in like reality and that feels so good.

FS: So where do Avid Consumers run the risk of making mistakes?

EJ: Whatever your weaknesses -- it's like you if you're into video games or whatever it is -- it's that piddly little spending that you feel guilty about it. But here's the thing. Ask yourself how good it makes you feel. You might get a little dopamine kicked by having that purchase. But it’s not making you happier. There is no connection between shopping and happiness. But security definitely contributes to your well-being, and meaningful experiences, you know, whether that is something free like spending time with people you care about, or being very conscious and saving up for a vacation

FS: Okay, Emma, you have one message to give to Avid Consumers. What do you want to tell them?

EJ: It's a choice you're an adult. You have willpower and free will. And this is again back to living a really optimal life and you have a choice.

FS: Thank you so much, Emma.

Okay, so what are the takeaways for you as an Avid Consumer?

First, give yourself an allowance so that you can’t spend more than what your budget affords. Carry cash. Spend that cash and only that cash. Don’t allow yourself to pull out that credit card!

Second, force yourself to pause before making an impulse purchase. When you feel inclined to buy something new, follow Staff Sergeant Jeff Rose’s rule: Wait a full 72 hours before you reach for your wallet.

And third, take a close look at your account statements and bills. Think about your goals and priorities. Ask yourself, is your spending aligned with those priorities? If not, follow Emma Johnson’s advice, and think about what changes you can make.

Okay, so we’ve heard what it’s like to manage money as an Avid Consumer. But to get the full picture of your financial situation, we also have to think about your current stage of life. What’s unique about being in your 30s? What m ight be some of the challenges in front of you right now? And what about the opportunities?

Out in the world, I also asked some folks in their 30s for snapshots of their finances. This is what they told me.

When I turned 30, I definitely saw myself more as like an adult.

I feel very anxious about my debt. I just didn't think I'd still have this problem at 30.

There's all of this, like, shame associated with not having enough money. And then there's also all of this anxiety with, like, getting money, and making sure you have enough money.

FS: So this is what I heard: The 30s are all about change. You’re looking to the future, laying the foundation for the rest of your life. You might be choosing a partner, thinking about buying a home, or having children.

One woman I spoke to was right in the middle of her 30s -- and entering a whole new phase of adulthood. She and her husband had just bought a house and just had a baby. And she was feeling a little uneasy about her finances. Here’s what she said.

Erin: My name is Erin and I'm 36. I think my 30s I kinda feel like an adult.

Childcare is a giant worry of mine. Now my goals, workwise, are just making enough money to pay for his daycare. Since being pregnant, I tried to get all of my ducks in a row and I opened up an IRA, and my husband has a 401K, and we have a little thing for my son. You know, so we definitely - we’re putting into saving.”

FS: Again, I wanted to talk to a financial expert, to hear what advice they would give to Erin or someone similarly squeezed between big life decisions. I reached out to Kimberly Palmer, a financial journalist.  Kimberly writes a lot about money management for parents. And whether you have kids or not, she’s got tons of good advice for 30-somethings. Here’s Kimberly.

FS: Let's talk about Erin a little bit. You know, so Erin is realizing that child care is almost as much as her mortgage. What advice would you have for Erin?

Kimberly Palmer: I love Erin’s story because it's like, wow, I have these huge expenses and I feel so crunched. So I think that first of all, she can let go of some of the guilt that she has about spending money on certain things. I definitely got the sense from what she’s saying that she feels guilty now.

So I think my main advice to her is to step back for a minute and just make a list of all of your priorities. And making your budget then to reflect those priorities so you don't feel this daily, oh no, I'm spending too much money on that. Because you've worked it out. You know you will be spending money on those things, at least for the foreseeable future, and that's okay. And you'll just make sure that your budget can handle it.

FS: I'd love to talk about personal finance generally for people in their 30s. So what are the financial challenges and concerns that you see facing people in their 30s? You are a 30-something, right?

KP: I am. I’m right in the middle there. Yeah, so the biggest is just that we have so much pressure, so much expenses just sucking away at our income. So it's hard to handle it all. A lot of us are starting to have parents that might need help assistance, either caregiving or financially in some cases. And then at the same time our kids’ expenses are just growing. Kids are so expensive. And then on top of that we have - we're trying to manage our careers and our earning potential and power trying to grow that amidst all of that pressure. A lot of us still have student loans we're paying off too. We have bigger household expenses: mortgage, rent. So I mean it's like everything is hitting us at once. And it's - the question is how do we juggle all that.

FS: So those are the challenges and concerns. What are some advantages to being somebody in your 30s when it comes to finances?

KP: We have so much earning potential still ahead of us. If we can hold on to that earning power and build it then that is something we really have on our side.

FS: What are the big decisions you see 30-somethings facing when it comes to money?

KP: First of all think it's about prioritizing what those long term goals are. I mean, you have to kind of pick and choose because we can't do everything. So are you going to save for your own retirement, which I think we have to make our top priority, versus setting up your kid's college savings account, which of course we want to do also, but maybe we have to wait a little bit while we still are getting our own retirement goals down.

FS: How should people be thinking about retirement when they're in their 30s?

KP: Retirement might feel like it's still far off, but, you know, it's the most important thing we can do in our 30s, is to make sure we've opened up those accounts if we haven't already. It's so striking if  you look at the numbers of when you start saving for retirement. If you start in your 20s you have to save so much less to get to the same amount than if you start in your 30s or 40s. And if we can just feel motivated enough by that to open up those accounts as soon as possible it will pay off so much in the long run. It's so important for us to do.

FS: Okay, so did you catch that? First of all, Kimberly Palmer says that you have to concentrate on saving for retirement in your 30s. Make sure you open up those retirement accounts. Now is the time!

She also says that before you make a budget, you should think about your goals and priorities. What’s most important to you? And then make sure you’ve organized your budget to reflect whatever it is you most want. Because ultimately, how you spend your money is just a reflection of your values.

And we learned that in your 30s, you still have tons of earning potential. Make sure you’re taking steps in your career to keep maximizing that potential. Go after that promotion! Ask for that raise!

Last of all, we want everyone to know that if you’ve made mistakes or been out of balance with your financial choices, there’s no shame in it. Every financial expert stresses that it’s never too late. You can make meaningful changes starting today.

So whatever you do, or however you feel about money. No matter what age you are or behavior type you fall into, it’s okay. You just need to be aware of the kind of person you are when it comes to your finances so you can grow, and more importantly be happy!

That’s all for this episode of MoneyMind.

Special thanks to our guests: Jeff Rose, Emma Johnson, and Kimberly Palmer. And special thanks to Monique and Erin for sharing their stories.

If you want to learn about money matters at other stages of life, or if you’re curious about other financial behavior types, check out slate.com/exploremoneymind.

You can also subscribe to the entire series wherever you get your podcasts.

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I’m Faith Salie. Thanks so much for joining us.

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