Customer complaint letters: Pick the winner!

2  January 2011

Dear Mr. Robertson,

Are you still in charge of Eagle TWE? If so, I have a problem I hope you can help me resolve. Almost a year ago I sent my rebate coupon, a self-addressed stamped envelope, and a letter to the rebate address, but have yet to hear back about my condom rebate or about the expired condom I was sold from a vending machine in or near Lynchburg, Virginia.

I have attached a copy of my original letter to this message. Could you see that my rebate and refund or replacement condom is sent?

Sincerely,

A.B. Crowder

(Result: Crowder received eight unexpired condoms.)

7)    A customer complaint in verse.

BONES by Gayle Knutson

[Sent to Campbell's Soup Co. in May 1993]

I think that I shall never see
a bone as pointed as is thee.

A bone whose crunch heard in my head
was loud enough to wake the dead.

A bone I found within your soup
I served for dinner to my troop.

A bone that may have choked a cat
was hidden in a piece of fat.

Upon whose label it did not list
the skeletal part that did exist.