Hot spittle, sizzling on pain’s grill.
Hopsicle: bouncy, tooth-chilling, bad
for you. Hopcycle: a gamboling bike.
Opposite of hope’s fiddle. No
“Soldier’s Joy.” No “Jolie Blonde.”
Hive full of people in white coats
(or green, or blue) commanding,
“Swallow this,” inflicting tests that punish
if you pass or fail—people hump-
backed with sacks of doom they throw
down on my bed, and bolt. Losspital:
place where losers meet. Hospice:
little. (How big do death-rooms
have to be?) Hiss bottle, has pickle.
Ass brittle—like the rest of me!
“Have you ever,” a clipboard-man
demands, “been hospitalized?”
Been ossified? Alphabetized?
Fossilized? Caramelized? I won’t
leave here the same, or possibly,
alive. Hot tickle. I’m not giggling.
House pistol. If I get my hands
on one . . . Horse drizzle,
swizzle, sizzle—let me ride away!
Some guy is fishing, on TV,
for river-monsters toothier than tiger
sharks. How can I rest
with all these teeth gnawing at me?
Cords yank out every time I turn.
My monitor pings. “Sorry,” I tell
the nurse who runs in. “Still not dead.”
“That’s good,” she chirps, and jabs
a needle into me. Hiss
piddle. Hose poodle. Hat riddle:
How’s a 10-gallon like a barbershop?
Cop fizzle, sop griddle, lop pizzle,
lot pedal, toss stipple. Glass
house-pitiful you shouldn’t throw
up in, stoned or not. Hostile
hostel, I won’t come back, I swear!
Hose pustule, top tickle, Oz puddle.
“Thank you,” I tell each doc,
meaning, “Fuck you for being well.”
Bop middle, slop griddle, rot victuals,
Hope’s diddle. The Grand Hotel
You enter immortal, and exit disposable
TODAY IN SLATE
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How can the president’s party defend itself from the president’s foreign policy blunders?
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Piper Kerman on Why She Dressed Like a Hitchcock Heroine for Her Prison Sentencing
Windows 8 Was So Bad That Microsoft Will Skip Straight to Windows 10
We Need to Talk: A Terrible Name for a Good Women’s Sports Show
Cringing. Ducking. Mumbling.
How GOP candidates react whenever someone brings up reproductive rights or gay marriage.
How Even an Old Hipster Can Age Gracefully
On their new albums, Leonard Cohen, Robert Plant, and Loudon Wainwright III show three ways.