Sucking up another dumb movie on HBO it comes to me how boring it is to loll here like a
boil on an ass.
Boring, not as in Berryman’s “Life, friends is boring we must not say so …” —life isn’t
just thinking of matters which don’t set my teeth on fire and make the dents in my brain
screech is boring.
For instance: I switch to a news channel and a segment about what a Republican
I refuse to utter his name—proclaimed on being caught changing his chameleon mind
“Quoting me is lying about me.” Now that’s not boring, is it? That leaps right into your
A person denouncing his own convictions as possibly being too true? My god, Nietzsche
(and he was in my philosophical gawk-time all but my god), who growled of our having
“gnawed at ourselves,”
and “turned ourselves into torture chambers,” wouldn’t have known what to make of such
conscienceless crap …
Wait, though, maybe as my mother would say I’m over-excited—I’ve always been such a
That political lizard and those like him—so many like him—are hardly the worst things in
Think Stalin. Think Mandelstam on his hell-train, shuddering with fever, dying of a line in
And remember how that Dream Song continues? “After all, the sky flashes, the great sea
we ourselves flash and yearn …” and they do, and we do, but we’re terrified, too,
sometimes for, and sometimes we can’t tell the difference, because history shudders and
and it can seem only the torturers and tyrants, the venal demagogues and the qualmless
stand firm, gazing out over the hapless rest of us to decide which will be next, which
which flash and which yearning will be dragged down and submerged in their political
As I’m dragged down again into the ocean of cathode image-scum pumping out at me
from the sewer-screen,
rendering me gloomy beyond gloom, not beyond Berryman’s, please, but still, my tail is
fangs are unsheathing in the lining of my heart … Better turn it off—all of it, off. Jesus
TODAY IN SLATE
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