Watch John Oliver Explain Perfectly Why You Should Hate FIFA

Slate's soccer blog.
June 9 2014 12:15 PM

Watch John Oliver Explain Perfectly Why You Should Hate FIFA

screen_shot_20140609_at_12.09.19_pm_1

John Oliver has for the second consecutive week issued a hilarious, brutal, and elucidatory rant about a galling but sometimes tedious issue. On last week’s episode of Oliver’s new HBO show Last Week Tonight, it was his brilliant takedown of the FCC’s newly proposed anti-net-neutrality rules that went viral. This week he digresses beautifully on the corruption, crassness, and general ugliness of soccer’s world governing body, FIFA.

“For American viewers who may never have encountered them, FIFA is a comically grotesque organization,” Oliver begins, before comparing the group to ancient Egyptian slave masters, unaccountable hegemonic global religions, and the makers of 2 Girls 1 Cup. Among the many FIFA sins Oliver lists are the human rights abuses of 2022 World Cup host country Qatar, various bribery scandals, its imposition on Brazil of a law legalizing beer sales at World Cup matches, white elephant World Cup stadiums, and its farcical self-description as a nonprofit organization with a billion dollars in the bank.

Advertisement

The segment perfectly encapsulates every soccer fan’s great moral quandary: How do you support a sport you love so much without supporting an organization so clearly worthy of disdain? 

Jeremy Stahl is a Slate senior editor. You can follow him on Twitter.

 

TODAY IN SLATE

History

The Self-Made Man

The story of America’s most pliable, pernicious, irrepressible myth.

The GOP Senate Candidate in Iowa Doesn’t Want Voters to Know Just How Conservative She Really Is

Does Your Child Have “Sluggish Cognitive Tempo”? Or Is That Just a Disorder Made Up to Scare You?

The Supreme Court, Throughout Its History, Has Been a Massive Disappointment

Why Indians in America Are Mad for India’s New Prime Minister

Damned Spot

Now Stare. Don’t Stop.

The perfect political wife’s loving gaze in campaign ads.

Building a Better Workplace

You Deserve a Pre-cation

The smartest job perk you’ve never heard of.

Rehtaeh Parsons Was the Most Famous Victim in Canada. Now, Journalists Can’t Even Say Her Name.

Parents, Get Your Teenage Daughters the IUD

The XX Factor
Sept. 30 2014 12:34 PM Parents, Get Your Teenage Daughters the IUD
Moneybox
Sept. 30 2014 12:04 PM John Hodgman on Why He Wore a Blue Dress to Impersonate Ayn Rand
  News & Politics
Jurisprudence
Sept. 30 2014 2:36 PM This Court Erred The Supreme Court has almost always sided with the wealthy, the privileged, and the powerful.
  Business
Building a Better Workplace
Sept. 30 2014 1:16 PM You Deserve a Pre-cation The smartest job perk you’ve never heard of.
  Life
Education
Sept. 30 2014 1:48 PM Thrashed Florida State’s new president is underqualified and mistrusted. But here’s how he can turn it around.
  Double X
The XX Factor
Sept. 30 2014 12:34 PM Parents, Get Your Teenage Daughters the IUD
  Slate Plus
Behind the Scenes
Sept. 30 2014 3:21 PM Meet Jordan Weissmann Five questions with Slate’s senior business and economics correspondent.
  Arts
Brow Beat
Sept. 30 2014 3:59 PM The Trailer for Taken 3 Is Here, and Guess Who’s on His Phone Again
  Technology
Future Tense
Sept. 30 2014 2:38 PM Scientists Use Electrical Impulses to Help Paralyzed Rats Walk Again
  Health & Science
Bad Astronomy
Sept. 30 2014 7:30 AM What Lurks Beneath the Methane Lakes of Titan?
  Sports
Sports Nut
Sept. 28 2014 8:30 PM NFL Players Die Young. Or Maybe They Live Long Lives. Why it’s so hard to pin down the effects of football on players’ lives.