Seinfeld2000 captures “the mocking, ‘no hugging, no learning’ ethos that formed the core of the original show,” as Politico’s Ben White put it in an email. White is another of the number of journalists who have taken sides in the faux feud between the two Seinfeld-inspired accounts. Why do so many journalists side with S2K? There’s the desire to be part of an “in” crowd that recognizes unappreciated genius, of course. But part of it is that journalists are constantly, professionally immersed in Twitter and in the daily inanities of our culture that Seinfeld2000 lampoons so well. They get what Seinfeld2000 is up to.
When it comes to political writers like White, it may help that the fifth character of Seinfeld2000’s cast is an evil, Tea Party-style version of Barack Obama. “U.S. Presedent Barack Sadam Husene Obame sit in the darkened Oval Ofice at 2 a.m. wearing hes traditienel Kenyan roabe,” we read in The Apple Store. “He take one last bite of the Chicago style deep dish pizza that he has flown to him every day on the Amerecan tax payer’s dime and wipe the grease off his mouth with the U.S. consititutien. He get up and walk to desk, where he keeps the Kenyan black magic crystle ball. Its black glow iluminate his face. ‘Eeny, meeny, miney, mo—which basic U.S. freedoms are next to go?’ he say aloud to no one and every one at the same time.”
“Yes, it is out of nowhere,” Seinfeld2000 told me of Obama’s emergence in this fictional universe. “This guy”—that is, the imaginary man with terrible spelling who is the very unreliable narrator of the whole Seinfeld2000 project—“is just a little bit ignorant and hates the president and is so anti-Obama that even in something completely unrelated this sentiment will make it through to the extent that Obama, for some reason, is now a Seinfeld character.”
And Seinfeld2000 also gets at the original show’s occasionally fraught racial dynamics. One of the funniest—and most cringe-inducing—scenes in the book is a gang war between the hopelessly racist Kramer character (a callback to Michael Richards’ real-life racist outburst in 2006) and a gang of black street thugs who are led by a fat kid “whose name is probably Jamal, 90% chance.” In The Apple Store, minorities are reduced to generic stereotypes, another big complaint about the original series that Seinfeld2000 cleverly sends up.
So what’s next for Seinfeld2000? Will the whole thing be coming to an end soon? Given that Seinfeld2000 has already faced a copyright attack over his e-book, the thought of transforming the idea into, say, a network TV show may sound ill-advised. But Seinfeld2000 doesn’t actually need the Seinfeld characters in order to be funny. When I asked him to respond to some questions in the voice of Seinfeld2000, he veered off wildly into an unrelated imaginary world that only confirmed his unique comic voice:
A: If i can be honast with you for a minute, OK, its like basicly? They stoale my idea for a twiter acount that twetes imegenary plot's for Seinfeld show if senfeld was still on televesion in modarn day. So its like their stealing my baby. And if theres one thing ive learned from life expereince, its dont steal babys, ESPECIALY not from Walt Disney World Rasort in 2006, even if the baby is unatended and you were planing on takeing it to the authorety's eventual.
Q: You’ve said this before, that SeinfeldToday “stole” your Twitter concept, but how can that be true if Seinfeld Today started publishing first?
A: WTF JERAMY WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON, I THOUGHT SLAITE WAS SUPOSED TO BE A QUALETY SITE FOR ONLINE JOURNELISM THAT MAKE YOU THINK BUT ALSO FACTUEL
Q: SeinfeldToday doesn’t seem to care as much about you as you care about them. Why do you think your feud with SeinfeldToday isn’t reciprocal?
A: First off all, the word is speled "reciprecal" which is prety much anather red-flag about this online site your working for. So thats strike two Sammey Sosa. And as far as im concern,theyre not intaracting with me for the same reasen that a burgalar who home invasien's your house and murder's your whoale family and get's away w it dosent call you up to chat afterward's.
A risk-taking and comedy-savvy cable network like FX, or its new comedy-focused sister network FXX, would be a great home for a show that captures the voice of a Seinfeld2000-like character, maybe replacing the stalker-like obsession with Seinfeld for a 20th Century Fox property, or maybe another subject entirely. A series by Seinfeld2000 would have the potential to become the most surreal thing ever to appear on American television.
Imagen the possibilitiy?