"Arresting Robert Downey Jr. every eight months whether he needs it or not."—Greg "Please do not put me down as 'similarly' for the 'Carmen Miranda warnings' answers" Diamond

"Cross-dressing Fridays!"—Larry Amoros (similarly, but just casual, William Vehrs and Steven Davis; casual and khaki, Matt Sullivan)

"Enlivening oral arguments with a drinking game. Counsel uses the phrase 'jurisprudence,' drink. Antonin Scalia gets testy and sarcastic, drink. Clarence Thomas asks a question, chug.—Charlie Glassenberg (similarly, Francis Heaney)

"Outsourcing the prisons to the Wackenhut Corp., which astonishingly provides high rates of return on capital while respecting 'almost all' constitutional rights."—Norman Oder

"Free access to Clarence Thomas' porn library."—Steven Davis

"Looking really innocent, tilting your head about 40 degrees to the left, scrunching up your face and saying, 'The bill of what?' in a confused voice. Then kicking the shit out of the perp."—Jon Zerolnick

"The big 'Wheel of Sentencing' they keep in the back for close calls."—Tim Carvell (similarly, Charlie Glassenberg)

"The clock which tells us when our three (3) hour lunch hour (?) is up."—M. Collet

"Using the decisions on Judging Amy as binding precedent."—Charles Star

"Crucifixion (though this method tends to work better with thieves than persons accused of civil disobedience)."—M.G. Lord (similarly, Britton J Wingfield)

"Robocop."—Joel Grus

"Metamucil."—Matt Carroll

"Rotating celebrity judges."—William Vehrs

"The 'Yeah ... but did he need killin?' defense."—Jon Drumwright

"Latest mandatory sentencing rule: Three strikes and you're sent to play for the Devil Rays!"—Anthony Wright

"Limited use of the fatwah."—Lance Durbin

"Monica Lewinsky. (I'm waiting for your call, Mr. Leno.)"—Cliff Schoenberg

"The cloning of Nino Scalia."—David Feige

"Leaking info to Linda Greenhouse."—David Finkle

"Access to the justices' sauna and personal masseur."—Brooke Saucier

"The adoption of that saucy Judge Judy lace collar as a compulsory accent to the jurist's basic black."—Carrie Rickey

"Slits in the front of judicial robes."—Marsha Fleming

"The Vibra-Luv 2000."—Jay Austin

"Free-balling underneath the judges' robes (or free-bushing, as the case may be)."—Jim Cochran

"A judiciary appointed entirely by the Presidential Barbie administration."—Peter Carlin

"Not bothering to count the votes and just assuming."—Omer Benjakob

"Jo-Jo, the Justice Dog, who sniffs out the right decision by eating the food from either the 'Affirm' bowl, or the 'Deny' one.*"—Tim Carvell (*The concept of Jo-Jo, the Justice Dog is available to be developed into a prime-time series by any network, save, perhaps, UPN.)

"Has a LAPD-free zone been established? If not, just put me down as a 'similarly' for any mention of 'rampart.' "—Jon Zerolnick

"Voir dire conducted by Regis Philbin, with increasing jackpots awarded to most impartial jurors."—Emily Nussbaum

"All those Latin words we use that allow us to pull down the big bucks."—John Tyrrell

"The knowledge that Janet Reno's likeness is cut into the bottom of Justice Rehnquist's gavel."—Ellen Macleay

"Strom Thurmond's ass. (It's not very original, but will it at least get me a 'similarly'? It's just so funny to think of Strom Thurmond's ass as 'workable.')"—Emily Asplund

Self-Reference Corner

"Putting Dahlia Lithwick behind a column in the press gallery."—Steven Davis, Dilan Esper

"Re No. 419. If someone named Bilionis gives an answer with 'McDonald's' in it, I think it is only fair that he have a nickname like "and Bilionis served"—even though you don't usually give out the nicknames. And, yes, I realize that I am just setting myself up for abuse."—Charles "Ken, Ringo, Brenda, Twinkle. Come on, you can do better than that" Star

"Who cares! Ya'll know what 420 stands for don't you (giggle giggle)? (I will be shocked and dismayed if this is the only 420 joke that News Quiz receives.)"—Greg Bilionis

(Say it loud; I'm ignorant and I'm … well, if not actually proud, at least unembarrassed. I do not know what 420 stands for.—Ed.)

"Do I have to live in New York/Chicago/L.A./Seattle to play in your treehouse?"—Peter O'Toole

(Note to rural participants. Coming up soon, a week of Farm Funnies. Our guarantee: no reference to books, movies, theater, dance, public transportation, Jews. Plenty of opportunity to use those gags about cattle parasites.—Ed.)

"You know, the first 10 times I looked at it I read a) as 'a little catnip while some gasbag lawyer is yakking away.' And I was a little surprised, because I thought no one on the court except Justice O'Connor still smoked it."—Greg Diamond