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Curriculum VitaleHow to polish your pro-basketball résumé.

By Elliot HannonPosted Thursday, Nov. 13, 2008, at 6:43 AM ET

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Jacob Leibenluft conducted a thought experiment on what would happen if all the best high-school hoopsters decided to play pro ball in Europe.

John Ebeling, an agent with the Megasport agency in Italy, says that Hughes' realistic, explanatory CV is far preferable to one that overhypes your game. James White's online résumé, for example—"Superhuman athleticism and leaping ability. Most athletic player in college basketball while playing for Cincinnati. … Dunked for the first time as a 12-year old"—might come off as a bit over-the-top. Rather than making yourself sound like a human highlight reel, Ebeling prefers technical information: plays multiple positions and excels in an up-tempo offense, not capable of jumping over small children.

Along with the good, Ebeling suggests including a sliver of the not so good. It's a dreaded question for job applicants: What are your weaknesses? This doesn't mean "going off the deep end with actual negatives," he says. If you are an atrocious defensive player, keep a lid on it. Instead, pick a positive part of your game and say you're going to improve it. Alexander Lutter provides a textbook case of snatching self-congratulation from the jaws of self-deprecation: "[Lutter] is his own harshest critic and despite his ability to easily make defences—and gravity—seem irrelevant it is difficult to find a harder working player."

One thing that the basketball-résumé writer needn't worry about is spelling. While the typical job applicant seeks to avoid having his CV sound like 99-cent Viagra spam, this is nothing to fret about in the hoops world. Sure, English is the lingua franca of the basketball world, but most agencies that represent players abroad aren't overloaded with fluent speakers. So don't fret if your representative posts this sort of gobbledygook: "[Charles Gaines'] appearance, his forcefulness, his generosity in defensive assistance, his intimidation and his consistance makes him a determinant player, able to change by himself the dynamic of a team." Just as long as they spell your name right, you're probably OK.

If you don't trust an agent even to get that much right, you can always make your own résumé. For the player going it alone, the Web site Eurobasket offers a "Make-It-Pro" service. According to Eurobasket, not playing pro basketball may be the biggest mistake of your life: "If you feel that you are a quality player and you are able to contribute to a professional team overseas, please do not miss your opportunity." For just $39.99 for three months (or $105.99 for a full year), Eurobasket will list your online profile alongside those of 120,000 other players and coaches. While there are other companies that help players spread an online résumé, Eurobasket has the advantage of listing all of its free agents together, giving the impression that you're a real player, not just a rec-league bruiser.

As an aspiring professional hoops player myself—who isn't, really?—40 bucks seems like a small price to pay for a shot at fulfilling a lifelong dream. The first step of writing my basketball profile: taking the résumé I used to land my current job and deleting everything except my name and contact info. Step 2: adding my date of birth, nationality, height, and a position. (Remember, this needs to look professional: I'm 6-foot-3, so I'm calling myself a guard.) Next, some florid prose: "A team oriented player, Hannon's interior passing often makes big men look better than they actually are and his jump shot spreads defenses and frees up teammates." And finally a bit of self-criticism: "Needs to improve inbounding." You can look at the final product here.

I grab my credit card, submit the résumé to Eurobasket, and I'm officially a free agent. But not for long. A short while later, I get an e-mail from Marek Wojtera, manager of the site. "I am really confused about adding your record to the database," he writes. "The problem is that Make-It-Pro service is aimed at the players who have real chance to make it to professional basketball." Ouch. And it gets worse: "If I were the coach of a basketball club, I would not consider you as the candidate to join their pro roster. You may have extremely impressive stats, but if they are for playing at the local team, which is not recognized anywhere, you have really 0% chance to be called for any try-out. ... I do not see any real chance for you to make it to pro basketball and I believe it will be only wasting your money to try it."

Despite that e-mail, I'm not ready to quit. Did Rudy quit when everyone told him he wasn't good enough to play football at Notre Dame? Did Michael Jordan quit after being cut from his high-school basketball team? I don't think so. So, if any general managers are reading this, don't be discouraged by Marek Wojtera. I may not be good enough for Eurobasket, but I'm always ready to hop on the train from Brussels to Berlin—just as soon as I get home from work.