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The Weirdest Legal Pleading Ever

Florida attorney John B. “Jack” Thompson, a very eccentric anti-video-game crusader, has a long-running dispute with the Florida Bar. Thompson claims the professional organization “hectored” him by allowing representatives of the gaming industry to file so-called “strategic litigation” complaints against him. The Florida Supreme Court is considering the matter, but at the moment it’s more troubled by Thompson’s tactics.

On Feb. 19, the high court pursued sanctions against Thompson (see order to show cause below and on following two pages) to prevent him from submitting documents without the signature of “a member of the Florida Bar other than yourself” (Page 3). According to the order, Thompson, whom the justices previously warned not to file “pornographic” materials to the court, has more recently been submitting “numerous frivolous and inappropriate filings” (below). A federal court similarly reprimanded Thompson in September for submitting in evidence “several graphic images of oral and genital sex between adult males.”

The Florida justices were particularly riled by a recent pleading (excerpts on Pages 4 through 6) that took the form of a “children’s picture book for adults” (below). This step was necessary, Thompson wrote, because of “the Court’s inability to comprehend” his arguments. This pleading, the justices fumed, contained pictures of  “swastikas, kangaroos in court, a reproduced dollar bill, cartoon squirrels, Paul Simon, Paul Newman, Ray Charles, [and] a handprint with the word ‘SLAP!’ written under it.” When Thompson submitted the pleading in December, he forwarded it simultaneously to Justice Building, a blog maintained by a Miami lawyer using the alias “Rumpole” who reproduced and posted most of it, including the offending images. In a written preliminary response to the Florida justices’ adult-supervision order, Thompson termed the order a “panicked threat” and pledged to see them in federal court. “This court has just thrown Br’er Rabbit into the briar patch,” he wrote. “Thank you so very, very much.”

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