HOME / kerryisms: The senator's caveats and curlicues.

Kerryism of the DayThe senator's caveats and curlicues.

By William SaletanPosted Tuesday, May 18, 2004, at 5:47 PM ET

What did he say?Since 2000, Slate has poked fun at George W. Bush for his torture—some say it's merely abuse—of the English language. Our "Bushisms" collection captures (as Editor Jacob Weisberg explains in his latest volume) the president's ignorance, incuriosity, laziness, and thoughtlessness expressed in frequent gaffes. Now that Democrats have settled on a presumptive presidential nominee, it's time to cast an equally cold eye on the pomposity and evasiveness of John Kerry.

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Here's how to read a Kerryism. The text below is Kerry's quote translated into plain English. Kerry's actual quote, however, is full of caveats and pointless embellishments. To read these, click the numbers above the text, which will take you to the caveats and embellishments, presented as footnotes. (Words in brackets before a number are what a normal person would have substituted for the ornate phrase Kerry delivered. To see the ornate phrase, click the number and read the footnote.) To return to the main text, click the number at the beginning of any footnote. To see the whole quote as Kerry delivered it, with all the caveats and embellishments, click here. To get back to this Kerryism, click "Return to English version."

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Today's Kerryism:

"Let me just say^¹ that the^² abuse of Iraqi prisoners^³ is^⁴ unacceptable^⁵. And the response of the administration^⁶ has been slow^⁷. I believe the president needs to [give]^⁸ an explanation. What happened there has done a disservice to all of our troops ⁹^{10 11}, and it^¹²undermines America's^¹³ efforts in the region. It [puts]^¹⁴ our troops^¹⁵ in further jeopardy. It can increase acts of terror against America^¹⁶, and it undermines the^¹⁷ effort of the United States in the region. So^¹⁸it is important to [understand]^¹⁹ this as rapidly as possible and to make that explanation^²⁰ to the world."

—Los Angeles, May 5, 2004

[1] very quickly

[2] horrifying

[3] which the world has now seen

[4] absolutely

[5] and inexcusable

[6] —certainly the Pentagon—

[7] and inappropriate

[8] guarantee that the world is going to have

[9] who serve with great valor

[10] and greater courage

[11] and, I think, with distinction

[12] also

[13] own

[14] has the potential of putting

[15] —the rest of them—

[16] and Americans

[17] overall

[18] I think

[19] have an understanding of

[20] and any other appropriate comments

Got a Kerryism? Send it to .

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William Saletan is Slate's national correspondent and author of Bearing Right: How Conservatives Won the Abortion War. Follow him on Twitter here.

Photograph of John Kerry by Marc Serota/Reuters.

COMMENTS

Remarks from the Fray:

Look, I have no problem with the premise of this new column; Kerry's verbal mannerisms are fair game. But Saletan's approach here is essentially snarky copy-editing. Weisberg doesn't correct Bush's grammar or insert [sic] all over the place — he lets the quotes stand for themselves.

If what Saletan really wants is to criticize Kerry's adjective-laden style, that's fine, although it mostly comes down to aesthetics. But as a writer, Saletan should know better than to imply that there's some sort of equivalence between Kerry's verbosity and Bush's verbal incompetence.

--MarcEJohnson

(To reply, click here)

I avidly read Saletan's political journalism but he's gone off on a pointless tangent here in an apparent effort to devote equal time to candidates' intellectual foibles. Bushisms is a funny and often insightful recitation of GW's long-distance affair with English; this Kerryisms column already appears contrived and a failure. The words and phrases redacted in order to "plain-English-ize" Kerry's speech were neither superfluous nor obvious political-hedges, but rather appeared to be well-considered sentiments or emphases which effectively return political expression to it's once-celebrated role as the highest form of rhetoric.

Regardless — Slate already … devotes substantial effort to counter-balancing the gravity of Bushims. So long as Mickey Kaus keeps writing for Slate, no one else need feel obligated to "cast an equally cold eye" on anything...

--CLA2Q

(To reply, click here)

(5/18)

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