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Green Eggs and IslamI do not like Saddam-I-Am.

By Hart Seely
Posted Thursday, Dec. 5, 2002, at 1:48 PM ET
Illustration by William L. Brown

Saddam-I-am, Saddam-I-am,
I do not like Saddam-I-am!

Would you like him with Iran?

I would not like him with Iran.
I would not like him with Islam.
I would not like him spreading terror.
I would not like him anywhere-r!
I do not like Saddam-I-am!
I do not like that man, Saddam!

Would you like him with inspectors?
Would you like him with defectors?
Would you like him with no chemicals,
Which means no wartime epidemic-als?

Not with inspectors, not with defectors!
Not with Islam, not with Iran.
I do not like Saddam-I-am!
I want regime change for that man!

Arms! What if he had no arms?
Would you still make him buy the farms?
Nukes! Without them, would you let him?
Or would you send troops in to get him?

I do not want him with an arsenal.
I would not, could not! This is personal!
I do not like his oil-gained cash.
I do not like his black mustache.
I do not like Saddam-I-am!
I must disarm him. That's my plan.

You do not trust him,
So you say.
Inspect him, inspect him,
And you may.
Inspect him and you may, I say.

I will find bombs
You will see.
I may find them in a tree.
For I will look inside each stone,
And I will look beneath his throne.
And I will look in rolled-up socks,
And barber schools, and closed-down mosques.
And up the hill, and in the rain,
And in the dark, and on a train.
I will find them here and there-r,
He'll be our win in the war on terror!

I do so like
To bash this man.
Thank you,
Damn you,
Saddam-I-am!

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Illustration by William L. Brown.
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