Joel Achenbach and Marjorie Williams
Dear Marjorie,
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StumbleUponI think we're going to have a great week, there's so much stuff going down, the fur's flying, we got the Elián case about to explode, plus all these radicals are in Washington to protest globalization and greed and genetically engineered soybeans and whatnot. Maybe you can explain to me at some point, Marjorie, how I'm supposed to feel about the World Bank and the International Monetary Fund, because I've somehow managed to get through my entire life without having any thoughts about them whatsoever. Does the World Bank have ATMs? I am so clueless.
I do have thoughts on Elián, and this morning I'll probably write another column about the case, though that may be going to the well once too often. This story gives me the jitters. It makes me really anxious--that kid's in the line of fire in a terrible civil war. Yesterday on television one of the attorneys for the Miami relatives said this was basically a battle between Good and Evil. Why politicize a custody battle when you can theologize it? (Is that the right word, theologize? All I know is that wherever the kid goes, people perceive miracles and the image of the Virgin Mary.) It sounds as though the Miami relatives aren't going to lift a finger to return Elián to his father. The attorney says they'll just unlock the door and leave it up the marshals to get him (memo: Look under the bed), all of which sounds like a prescription for trauma if not disaster. Then they'll bring him back to Washington, just in time for the riots here. Elián is going to have quite an impression of America if and when he goes back to Cuba. "They have Disney World, and everyone's always chanting."
Bulletin: The Pulitzers will be announced today at 3, which I hope will bring great joy to the Post newsroom, which has a number of really deserving entries. Of course, since you and I aren't finalists, the prizes this year have ZERO CREDIBILITY. (Slap me if I start hitting Caps Lock a lot; it's a terrible habit I've developed, along with using the word "freakish." I think the impulse to capitalize is due to a deep-seated fear that no one on the Internet can really HEAR me.)
I'm pretty sure, by the way, that they don't give any kind of Pulitzer for online journalism. It's as though this material doesn't quite exist. But maybe that's a blessing--online journalism benefits from not being taken that seriously. I do think, by the way, that online journalism has to obey the same rules of fairness and accuracy as the journalism in other media--and I hope that's not a maverick position--but it doesn't have to stick to the same tone and structure. It has the stylistic freedom that comes from knowing that not only are you not eligible for a Pulitzer Prize, you have hardly any readers at all. I know when I write my column for washingtonpost.com I really enjoy the journalistic freedom that comes from having relatively few readers and almost no credibility. I can write anything! Total freedom will come when I figure out a way to write a column that only I can access. Sitting alone in a room, dipping my finger in a water glass and writing on a napkin--that's my dream, Marjorie. That's the mountaintop.
Did you see the live presentation of Fail Safe? I surfed to it a few times, and maybe that's a ridiculous way to watch a pulse-pounding drama, and I was struck by all the tiny little flaws in the sound and the lighting, the fact that, if this were going to be on tape, the director would have yelled "cut" repeatedly, because someone was coughing in the background or someone's voice was a bit too hoarse. Mostly I watched Eco-Challenge on Discovery, this insane race in Patagonia, the executive producer of which is my neighbor, Angus Yates. These crazy people are leaping into icy rivers and climbing jagged peaks and riding horses across the Pampas and basically doing everything they can to get injured, lost, and possibly dead, all at the end of the Earth. How do you fit a trip like that into your schedule? These people have such amazing energy, is what I was thinking as I operated the remote control.
All right, I gotta do my job for a bit. Bye for now.
Cheers,
Joel
Hitchens: The "War on Terrorism" Didn't Cause the Fort Hood Shootings
Enter Slate's Write-Like-Sarah Palin Contest
Whoa! The House Health Care Bill Is Actually Less Expensive Than the Senate's.
Like Israel but Colder: The Jewish Autonomous Region of Russia
Why Everyone Should Read When Everything Changed
Spitzer: How Tim Geithner Was Fleeced by Wall Street
Reader Response from The Fray--to be read after the final entry:
Let me get this straight: they give out Pulitzer's for criticism [Monday]? Please--my heart is pounding, my blood pressure is rocketing, my hands now shake, please dear, please, please tell me, where do I sign up?
--Old Timer [who is well-known in The Fray for his expertise in this area.]
(To reply, click here.)
Re: Elian Gonzales. I believe that immigration laws should be as open and welcoming as possible. But at the same time we need to look at the long-term situation of the country the people are fleeing. There is not always a whole lot we can do, and we also run the risk of becoming control freak America with it's thumb in every pie--oh, hang on, we already are that. Well, anyway, my point is that instead of trying to pass a bill to make Elian a citizen, why don't we lift the embargo and make life a little better for all Cubans?
--Anne
(To reply, click here.)
"That's exactly what Castro wants us to do", I believe, is the stock response to either ending or continuing the embargo.
--Steve Dowling
(To reply, click here.)
[This response almost silenced David Edelstein, but not quite:]
The embargo is a 40-year hissy fit, and it's time to give it a rest. Say what you will against Castro (I can say plenty), he'd have been long gone if the embargo had been lifted 25 years ago and Disney and all the other U.S. corporations had moved in with their sundry inducements to free (sic) enterprise.
--David Edelstein
(To reply, click here.)
The question of why people hate Janet Reno [Thursday] is a bit intricate and since I do hate her, I'd like to take a stab at it--the question, not her (I don't hate anybody that much). Reno reminds me of the Greek tragedy Antigone which shows us that strict enforcement of the law, by the book, isn't always the best thing. The Waco invasion wasn't the best thing, for example. I believe the law justified her actions, that the operation was by the book. But that doesn't mean it was a good thing. With Elian, there's that potential again that Reno will embark on the legal course, but that it won't be the morally right course.
Reno does not respect people who defy her. She assumes they are wrong and she acts on that and she has a tremendous amount of power to enforce her interpretation of law. This is the crux of my anti-Renoism: She doesn't talk to people, she barks orders at them. When people ignore the lectures they get punished. Hey, that's her job. But it'd be nice to have a more philosophical sort wielding all that power--someone with a better sense of proportion who realizes that every act of defiance is unique and deserves unique treatment.
--Michael Maiello
(To reply, click here.)
Don Porges writes in The Fray about Thursday's entry:
The definition and connotations of "dice" are much more precise in naming the objects in question. My old TI-99 had a "random number generator" command in its BASIC programming. Since it was just code, it resembled nothing that would help baby get a new pair of shoes. Besides "dice" fits into a headline nicely.
--Charles
(To reply, click here.)
[No proposals this week. But that doesn't mean the Breakfast Table went unappreciated:]
These guys were the best. And that's granting that there were some close competitors. But Joel and Marjorie are the BT gold standard. The King and Queen are dead! Bring on next week's random number generators!
--Mike
(To reply, click here.)
(4/14)