Well. That is rather hurtful.
Let’s go back to being nice, OK? Those people can get their own columns and we’ll post nasty things on their sites.
Actually, I have a large number of supportive e-mails. R. Herzog says: “Loved it! You and Lynda are great. Don’t worry about the ‘Fray.’” And Emma Waterhouse writes: “You two are the funniest, sexiest, most delightful couple since Nick and Nora. Please write more!”
Well, OK, I made Emma Waterhouse up, but R. Herzog exists and there are others where he came from.
And I think the reason Jennifer Mendelsohn got more marriage proposals than you, Lynda, is that you mentioned a kid, and you know what a can of worms that is.
Before I sign off, I want to mention that my vote for the best awards organization goes not to the Oscars but to the Silver Lenas of Toronto, Canada. They have some extra categories that the staid Academy never thought of. Most important, there’s both a “best” category and a “coolest” category–a useful distinction. This year’s “coolest” prize went to South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut–which was actually my choice for the best film of the year. (But think of the ridicule I’d have been spared if I’d had a “coolest” category.) Other coolest winners were Cate Blanchett in Ripley and Janeane Garofalo in Mystery Men (a movie I thought I was alone in liking). In the categories Best History, Most Underrated, and the Eric Stoltz’s Head Award for Widescreen Composition, the Silver Lena winner was the magnificent The Iron Giant.
Star Wars Episode One: The Phantom Menace was named the year’s worst film, while the Most Overrated prize went to American Beauty. Something called the Big Mallet That Goes Bok-Bok Award–my favorite category name of all time–went to Eyes Wide Shut. The Silver Lena press release adds that “Nicolas Cage achieved a remarkable feat when his performance in 8mm was presented with both Most Underplayed Role and Most Overplayed Role; the first time such a thing had happened. As more than one voter said, ‘Those who endured the movie should understand.’”
That’s great criticism.
Now then. Where do you and I stand on the Oscars?
We think, along with everyone else, that American Beauty will win big. But I like CiderHouse Rules best of all the nominees and will hold out a slim hope. (My feelings have nothing to with the DreamWorks vs. Miramax feud.)
We think Kevin Spacey will win. You prefer Denzel Washington; I have greater affection for Richard Farnsworth and Sean Penn. But Spacey, we both agree, was the cat’s pajamas. (Oh, I forgot to mention, the Silver Lenas gave the Best Animal prize to the psychic cat in Go.)
We think Annette will snag it. In truth, I think Hilary Swank deserves it more but I won’t be unhappy to see Bening with that statuette, especially if Roberto Benigni’s broken body lies nearby.
We don’t know about the Supporting Actor category, but your casting-agent friend says it’s Tom Cruise. We think it could be Osment or Caine. I think they’re all deserving in this category except for Michael Clark Duncan, but I blame the bum role, not the actor. (And I want to mention John C. Riley, Peter Skarsgaard, Christopher Plummer, and Peter Fonda in The Limey as being plausible nominees. Great category.)
We think Angelina Jolie is DA BOMB. Chloë Sevigny and Toni Collette are also superb and deserving, but it’s Jolie who’s the force of nature.
We think Sam Mendes is a lock.
We’d like to see my old Hebrew-school chum (er, I think) Charlie Kaufman get it for Being John Malkovich. And although we didn’t talk about it, I’d be happy with either Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor for Election or John Irving for Cider House.
We have not eliminated world hunger or deposed Rudy Giuliani in the “Breakfast Table” this week. But it seems to me that if–thanks to your lobbying of the Zanucks–more drunken exhibitionists are allowed the time and space to make fools of themselves on Oscar night, or if Annette Bening’s child is born with no physical (or mental) trauma at the hands of Roberto Benigni, then we’ll have contributed something of lasting value to society. Can the Mendelsohns say that?
XXX
David
