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Margo Howard and Franklin Foer

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from: Margo Howard

Evening of the Yo-yos

Posted Monday, Dec. 6, 1999, at 6:23 PM ET

Frank:

You are too generous about my Prudie credentials, but judging from the New Hampshire debate (tonight's being a few hours away) I thought they were all displaying manners up the ying-yang, to the point of ... well, being mannered. Do manners matter in politics? I'm afraid not, though if one were to cross the line in an extremely obvious way, negative reaction might bubble up--but not necessarily because the guy appeared to be rude but because he would appear to be desperate. When it comes to the authenticity quotient, I--being older, if not wiser--have pretty much written that off. All of them, Democrats and Republicans, are so cautious about image that whatever "real" characteristics seep out they serve as kind of personality tea leaves. Bradley is probably the most "authentic," and even he's had a little coaching.

Since I know you have a little time to kill before you go to work tonight, I've rustled up the news equivalent of junk food to give you sustenance for the upcoming Evening of the Yo-yos. Stuever in the Washington Post has a dishy piece on the Kennedy Center Honors, backstage, if you will. This interested me because a former husband (not one of the Jews) was on the Artists' Committee, and I always enjoyed the event. En passant I read that the former Ritz Carlton (nee the Fairfax) has been rechristened the Westin Fairfax. This interested me because a former husband (one of the Jews) used to own it. Also of interest was our president recalling his visit to the Parthenon (owned by no one I was married to) wondering what our civilization's monument would be. I'm guessing a 40-story black beret.

There are big doings in the divorce arena. The daughter of Faith Whittlesley (Reagan chum and twice ambassador to Switzerland) is divorcing a Rockefeller relly named O'Neill. Putting aside that the once happy couple might do well to reside with the attendant from whom Alan Keyes escaped, the big frou-fra is that heretofore secret Rockefeller Trust details may wind up in a Florida court! And speaking of money, another Florida couple has bought the $100,000 millennium package at the Boston Ritz Carlton. (Nope, never married to him.) The wife said, looking forward to New Year's Eve afternoon, "I'll be drinking champagne all day." Well, I'm crossing my fingers that the dear girl is awake when it's time for dinner. She has also requested "Gilbert and Sullivan entertainment." Wouldn't you think for that kind of money they could get Gilbert and Sullivan? In any case, I am not mentioning the name of this couple so the United Way people won't waylay them on their way to dinner.

And here's a great nugget: A "supermodel" was tear-gassed by a taxi driver driven crazy by the constant ringing of her cell phone. I'm with the mad macer on the phone deal, but the real question is what was a supermodel doing in a cab? I mean, I'm only a potential Oil of Olay model, and I wouldn't be caught dead in one. But onward. Lucianne and her dot-com are all het up about people dissing the Baby Jesus. She says Hillary called him homeless, then Al Sharpton said he was unemployed. Which makes for a nice segue to my thought that you and I should perhaps cool our ethnic references. It is conceivable that we could incite people in sheets to march on Slate's offices, which, while not actually in Seattle are close enough ... and I know for a fact that the riot squads there are pooped. Well, maybe just one more latke. And do check your shoes for scorpions.

xxM.

the breakfast table
entries
12345678910111213141516
from: Margo Howard

Evening of the Yo-yos

Posted Monday, Dec. 6, 1999, at 6:23 PM ET
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Margo Howard is "Dear Prudence," Slate's advice columnist. Franklin Foer, a former Slate staff writer, writes about politics for U.S. News & World Report.
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