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I've missed Mr. Breslin too...
Amen to the lot, NoStar. Plus: NoStar:Your civil acknowledgment of White Rabbit's criticism is an example for all who feel the lash of a bad review. You and Mr. Breslin ''ain't seen nuthin' yet'' if you think that was a bad review. If it were a bad review, then I would've set the text to ''Home on the Range'' and stampeded the thing off the ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 24, 2008
Re: These One-Word Titles Are Hard to Pun (A Sonnet)
Thanks for your contribution for the sake of the Form and Function Man. I can only wonder what Mr. Breslin thought of this droll commentary on the vignette that he painted for us. wr ()()
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 24, 2008
My most abject apologies...
Dear MaryAnn, Wouldn't you know that starting right when I got up this morning, Work in the Real World kept me from getting to this. Something told me that if I didn't do this early (like, on Wednesday night or even Wednesday afternoon), I'd get to it too late. I always regret it when I don't listen to my intuition scream at me like that. I ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 24, 2008
Re: Sigh, Ren...again...
Foobs (again): It's strange to be so self-obsessedthat someone else's pain or deathproduces neither empathynor thoughts of noble charitybut rather leads one further inand from the world to memory's din;but after all, it's real fearthat makes such things to disappear. The poem, just as many doin flood of words or blessed fewhas petty verbal ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 22, 2008
P.S.
White_Rabbit: Although Foobs may not thank me for saying this, I believe that Mr. Breslin shows us (technically) what contemporary poetry on Slate should be. He takes the same fundamental idea behind Mr. Donne's devotion (which is not in rhyme and meter but in formal prose) and puts it in a modern context (which has no rhyme or meter either but ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 22, 2008
Re: Sigh, Ren...
Foobs: It's strange to be so self-obsessedthat someone else's pain or deathproduces neither empathynor thoughts of noble charitybut rather leads one further inand from the world to memory's din;but after all, it's real fearthat makes such things to disappear. The poem, just as many doin flood of words or blessed fewhas petty verbal games to ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 22, 2008
Re: Just for the record...
Hi MaryAnn, Chalk the missing ''Oscar'' up to the strange circumstance of the title not being copied and pasted when I copied the whole poem. This forum's format doesn't allow for quick transitions between the column's front page and the text entry box, and unfortunately neither does my short-term memory, so if ''Oscar'' wasn't in the text I had ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 20, 2008
Line breaks, indentation, cleverness...
...ahem. :) There's a reason I keep saying this: form follows function in effective poetry. Get the function worked out properly -- that is, ''actually (conceive) something'' as your goal -- and the choice of form usually will take care of itself. By that measure, ''Ranch'' is not half bad (as free verse works for conveying naked thoughts in a ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 16, 2008
And then again...
...I do think (and firmly believe) that the poem could be greatly strengthened by a) following basic grammar and syntax more strictly while b) being more inventive in some of the expressions it uses to describe things and states of mind. Why can't the whole poem be as exquisite (or even in some cases, potentially so) as some parts of it? wr ()()
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 16, 2008
Just for the record...
The more I think about Ms. Ball's poem, the more it jells in my mind. I like it. It gives the effect (intentionally and, I think, well) of a mind starting off in an organized way about the objective beauty of a lonely place... Here there are places remarkablefor how no one ever comes—no asphalt, no people, no trivia: only hills, creeks, ...
Posted to Poems by White_Rabbit on July 16, 2008

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