Things you might reasonably expect to encounter while spelunking: bats, for sure. Stalactites, probably. While you’re at it, stalagmites. But a glowing, sun-dappled, half-naked Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau?! Believe it, baby.
Last week, a family by the name of Godby was vacationing in Quebec’s Gatineau Park and happened upon Trudeau, emerging from a cave. Shirtless. And probably damp. How is this guy for real? Americans thought we had it good with Joe Biden, the vice president who inspired a new genre of Onion article and whose life was once said, jokingly, to be the basis for the movie Forrest Gump. But Trudeau is on another level of virality. His other swoon-worthy antics include naming a gender-equal cabinet, memorizing the definition of quantum computing, participating in a steamy summit for North American leaders, filming a feminist video, and many, many more examples of woke bae-itude.
No sooner had the Godbys arrived at the park’s thousands-of-years-old Lusk Cave (more like Lust Cave) one day last week than they overheard Trudeau’s voice from within the cave, saying, “This is the moment of truth. Do we stop here or continue?,” according to Ontario blog PTBO Canada, which first reported the story. “It was just said with such an enthusiastic, joyful tone that that’s what kind of struck me,” Jim Godby told the Toronto Star. You don’t say! Soon Trudeau materialized and started spreading good cheer along with his wife, Sophie Grégoire Trudeau, and their two children. The cave contains a stream, which the Trudeaus encouraged the family to try and which also explains his shirtlessness, not that he really needs an excuse. Young Alexander Godby asked for a selfie, at which point Trudeau unleashed his trademark grin (and flexed his trapezius muscle). The resulting picture was blurry, but wouldn’t your hands shake too if Justin Trudeau had just popped out of a cave at you?
This anecdote contains hope for us all: The next time you see a cave, you should probably check to see if there is a hunky international statesman inside. Even if there isn’t, be grateful that while Trudeau is running Canada, he is also modeling work-life balance and promoting parks and natural resources!
Channing Tatum will play Trudeau in the movie adaptation of the Godbys’ anecdote. Kate McKinnon will play the Tatum/Trudeau part in the subsequent gender-swapped reboot.