Sexcereal! The Sexy Breakfast Cereal You Always Wanted

What Women Really Think
March 16 2013 2:31 PM

Sexcereal! The Sexy Breakfast Cereal You Always Wanted

824666
Sexcereal lends new meaning to "snap, crackle, pop."

Photo by Tim Boyle/Newsmakers

If you’re like me, you may have greeted this Saturday morning with a bowl of cereal. (Shhh, it counts as the morning if it’s before noon!) But were you nourishing your libido in addition to your body? Were you eating mere cereal, or…Sexcereal?

I am abashed to report that I was eating Cheerios. But if you live in Canada, and you don’t mind shelling out $12 for a bag, perhaps you were enhancing your sex drive and stamina with a product dreamed up in 2008 by Toronto businessman Peter Ehrlich. The specially formulated Sexcereal (motto: “Big Life Living—Fuel Your Fire!”) comes in two varieties, His and Hers, making it “the world’s first gender-based breakfast cereal.” Blazoned across the male packet is a hunky dude holding a suggestively large spoon; the female version features a busty Marilyn Monroe lookalike in red satin. 

Advertisement

Hmm, gender-based breakfast cereal. My colleague Meg wrote a post earlier this week urging people not to renounce gender-specific products “just because.” Still, I’m not sure breakfast cereal passes her sniff-test

But maybe certain ingredients do promote female sexual health, and other ingredients do the same for male sexual health! What’s in Sexcereal, anyway? The company website lists, for “him,” such hot ingredients as rolled oats, wheat germ, chia seeds, blueberries, goji berries, bee pollen, and coconut sugar. The lady option contains, among other things, rolled oats, oat bran, soy protein, cranberries, almonds and ginger. It actually sounds a lot like standard-issue granola, give or take some bee pollen. (Have I perhaps been underestimating the erotic powers of granola? Or maybe some sort of carnal alchemy occurs when all the components are combined in a special way?)

Oh, look. Both varieties sprinkle in a rare Peruvian spice called maca powder, which Ehrlich says has aphrodisiac properties.

This is wonderful news for everyone who rolls out of bed at 7:30 a.m. on a Monday morning and immediately wants to have sex.

Katy Waldman is a Slate staff writer.