I just spent two hours watching WWE clips, which brings my lifetime total experience in the presence of WWE to two hours. I have come to the following conclusions: the Moppy storyline is problematic, the replacement of the sex-and-drug-filled “Attitude Era” with the now-ascendant “PG Period” is a tragedy, and a country in which a woman can go from living off food stamps in Maryland to building a multimillion-dollar steroid-soaked kayfabe wrestling-themed-soap-opera empire to winning a Republican Senate primary in Connecticut just might be the great country everyone says it is. Maybe.
McMahon is statistically tied with the very vanilla Democrat Chris Murphy, who has probably never been slapped by his own child on live television. West Hartford News reports that the WWE is pulling sexually explicit videos, which I gather are of the “Attitude Era,” from Youtube. The paper kindly summarizes some of the deleted scenes for us:
[Mcmahon] appears on camera in a wheelchair, staring into space as her husband, Vince, berates a woman playing his buxom mistress and orders her to undress, "crawl around" the ring, and "bark like a dog." She complies.
McMahon stays silent as her real daughter physically assaults the "mistress" and her real son physically assaults her husband …
Another [scene], appearing to take place in a funeral parlor, shows a male wrestler undressing himself, undressing the corpse of a woman in a casket, and then climbing on top of her.
One sees how these videos might be compromising in a close race, and indeed, Connecticut Democrats enjoyed the necrophilia shot enough to include it in their campaign materials. McMahon’s campaign won’t take responsibility for the pulled scenes, and the WWE, which is run by McMahon’s husband, says it is simply “removing dated and edgier footage” to reflect its “current family-friendly brand of entertainment.” The WWE also complains that the scenes are taken out of context, which I hope WWE fans will give us in comments. (Why is Linda in a wheelchair? Was the wrestler in love with the woman in the casket?) Whitewashing-aside, there’s still some good clip-viewing to be had. Here, for instance, is a video of an 80-year-old woman smoking a cigar while giving birth to a disembodied hand. Enjoy.
TODAY IN SLATE
More Than Scottish Pride
Scotland’s referendum isn’t about nationalism. It’s about a system that failed, and a new generation looking to take a chance on itself.
What Charles Barkley Gets Wrong About Corporal Punishment and Black Culture
Why Greenland’s “Dark Snow” Should Worry You
Three Talented Actresses in Three Terrible New Shows
The Human Need to Find Connections in Everything
It’s the source of creativity and delusions. It can harm us more than it helps us.
Happy Constitution Day!
Too bad it’s almost certainly unconstitutional.