A horrified friend shares what he found on Google when he searched for a definition of the word "literally."
People: The second definition, still up on the search results page, is not correct. There is a perfectly cromulent word that means "not literally true but feels important"—"figuratively." Of all the crimes one can lay on the doorstep of Vice President Joe Biden, the bowdlerization of "literally" is literally the most egregious. (Which is to say he has not, in fact, committed any worse crimes. I mean, maybe the passage of the bankruptcy reform bill.)