Update, June 27, 2014: Because of copyright issues, the video in this post has been removed.
The 136 goals scored in the group stage of the 2014 World Cup were the most ever. As you trudge through your day with temporary match withdrawal—the knockout round doesn’t begin until Saturday—Slate offers you a chance to relive those moments of joy and devastation: four goals each from Argentina’s Lionel Messi, Brazil’s Neymar, and Germany’s Thomas Müller; four for the United States and four against; and every other tally in the entire tournament, from Marcelo's opening own goal to Jan Vertonghen's gimme.
TODAY IN SLATE
The End of Pregnancy
And the inevitable rise of the artificial womb.
Doctor Tests Positive for Ebola in New York City
How a Company You’ve Never Heard of Took Control of the Entire Porn Industry
The Hot New Strategy for Desperate Democrats
Blame China for everything.
The Questions That Michael Brown’s Autopsies Can’t Answer
Kiev Used to Be an Easygoing Place
Now it’s descending into madness.
Don’t Just Sit There
How to be more productive during your commute.