The Trump Apocalypse Watch is a subjective daily estimate, using a scale of one to four horsemen, of how likely it is that Donald Trump will be elected president, thus triggering an apocalypse in which we all die.
We made it. Three debates, four-and-a-half-hours of sniffing and lurking that might have doubled as a pilot of Trump TV, and we’re all still here. Do a quick personal inventory; make sure all your limbs are where they were before the debates began. All good? Good. This is a big day. Perhaps not for America, that day is still nearly three weeks off, but for Americans, particularly those that have televisions. Other than—gasp—winning the presidency, these three debates were the biggest stage, the largest portion of our collective attention, that Donald Trump could possibly occupy, and, yes, it was painful at times, but we’re through the worst of it.
That’s not to say the election is a done deal or that the next two weeks-and-change won’t have their fair share of Trump-induced horribleness. They will. But as coach likes to say after the team has won an important game, but not yet the series: We’re going to savor this one today, then we’ll put it behind us, and take it one day at a time from there.
As voters, tweeters, newspaper readers, cable news viewers, we’ve made it this far. The second worst thing of the entire campaign is behind us—Donald Trump participated in the presidential debates, like, for real. That really happened. You’ll tell your grandkids about it. The worst day of the campaign is yet to come—Donald Trump will be on the ballot to be the president of the United States. But, until then, pat yourself on the back, American. We know it’s been tough. You’re doing great. Or some of you are. Go home, have a drink, kiss your wife or husband, play with your kids, and we’ll see you back here tomorrow ready to, you know, play ball.
