All exclusive credit to Richmond CBS affiliate WTVR for breaking the scoop of the cycle: A Virginia man was sitting on the toilet and, son of a gun, if he didn’t see Donald J. Trump’s mug there staring right back at him from the tiling of his remodeled bathroom.
Do you see?!? “It’s a perfect image of him!” said Clayton Litten of Midlothian, Virginia. “When Litten asked the workers remodeling his bathroom if they too saw Trump in the tile,” WTVR reports, “he said they all agreed—they saw the Donald.”
It’s the weirdest thing. Once you see Donald Trump in one Midlothian bathroom tile, you see him in everything. How did Donald Trump’s face get in everything? Beats us, try asking God. But as proof, Slate picked six random stock photos and found that they all feature the visage of our next and final president.* Wow!
Trump’s Face in a Pile of Potato Chips
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A single potato chip contains multitudes. And a whole bunch of them contains at least one that looks like Donald Trump! If you look at the fourth potato chip, there’s an image of a smiling Trump turning away a boat of Muslim refugees from the shores of Cape Hatteras, North Carolina. Can you see the lighthouse?
Trump’s Face in Rain on a Window
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Look at the big drop to the right of the streak on the left side. Go up four drops, and then go to the left another 27 drops. From there, go down six drops and draw a straight line pointing 212 degrees southwest and follow that line for another 21 drops. Combine that drop with the 12 drops surrounding it, and there’s Donald Trump giving Dennis Rodman a gift box of Trump Steaks and old Playboys for surviving the latest challenge on his business-themed television show.
Trump’s Face in a Brick Wall
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This one’s trickier. You’ll need to act like Clayton Litten and sit on a toilet, and you’ll also have to play a vinyl version of Brian Eno’s Ambient 1: Music for Airports in the background. Once you do that and say “Mexican judge” six times fast, an image of Donald Trump chokeslamming WWE owner Vince McMahon into the canvas at SummerSlam will leap at you.
Trump’s Face in Some Lawn
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Trump performing various acts appears in 36 of these blades of grass. Warning before you zoom in: only 12 of them are safe for work.
Trump’s Face in a Dog Wearing a Dress and Pearls
Mike Watson Images Limited/Moodboard/Thinkstock
This is straight-up a photo of Trump in his wild Atlantic City days.
Trump’s Face in the Rocks at the Bottom of the Creek Where You Like to Go and Think
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These are a number of rocks from outer space that Trump brought with him when he arrived on Planet Earth. (On the culture of his home planet, rocks are said to be treated as Gods.) Each one contains a signaling device that, when exposed to certain rare oxides, lets Trump’s alien comrades know that the planet is ripe for extermination and subsequent colonization. The blue one looks Trump eating a double quarter-pounder with cheese, and french fries.
But really, you can see Trump’s face in Clayton Litten’s tile. Upper left corner.
*Correction, June 8, 2016: This post originally stated we found 10 random stock photos with Donald Trump’s image because we planned on making this a list of 10 because 10 is a nice round number. The gag was exhausted at four, but we gave you six anyway.
