The Slatest

Lenny Dykstra Says He Hired Private Investigators to Dig Up Dirt and Extort MLB Umpires

Former MLB outfielder, and current sociopath, Lenny Dykstra told FOX Sports’ Colin Cowherd on Tuesday that during his playing days he hired private investigators to tail Major League umpires so that he could use the information to extort them during the course of a game. Extramarital affairs, sexual orientation, gambling habits, nothing appears to have raised any internal moral red flags for Dykstra.

Always known for his hardnosed style of play, Dykstra told Cowherd he used everything in his power to win, including collecting information on umpires to help calls go in his favor. Dykstra says he paid $500,000 for the investigators and that it paid off.

Their blood’s just as red as ours. Some of them like women, some of them like men, some of them gamble … some of them do whatever… It wasn’t a coincidence I led the league in walks the next few years was it? …. Fear does a lot to a man.

Dykstra’s willingness to open up about his disturbingly shady dealings is, predictably, because he appears to have a book coming out. Dykstra’s prose is well-known to be as clear as the spittle dripping down his chin during his playing days. If this type of story seems like the type of story told by a pretty bad guy, you would be right—most evidence points to Dykstra being a pretty bad guy. You can take your publication of choice—ESPN, GQ, or the New Yorkerfor an update on Dykstra’s life as a fraudster in his post-playing days.