Donald Trump announces 2016 presidential exploratory committee.

Donald Trump Will Save America From Boring Grownup GOP Primary

Donald Trump Will Save America From Boring Grownup GOP Primary

The Slatest
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March 18 2015 6:05 PM

Donald Trump Will Save America From Boring Grownup GOP Primary

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Donald Trump is the hero this primary season needs.

Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images

Donald Trump announced Wednesday that he is forming a presidential exploratory committee because he is "the only one who can make America truly great again." A Trump candidacy might indeed be the one thing that can save our nation from an ominous threat on the horizon: a dull, issue-based Republican primary.

Even if the reality show star and serial bankruptcy-declarer somehow fails to win the party's nomination, his campaign could both lift our spirits with laughter and help our nation's recovery by stimulating the click-based economy. But Fear of a Trump Planet has some conservatives suffering flashbacks to the GOP's clown-car phase during the last presidential contest. From the National Journal:

Unlike 2012, when a wide range of eccentric candidates from then-Rep. Michele Bachmann to pizza giant Herman Cain enjoyed temporary front-runner status, the crop of 2016 candidates appears much more competitive and serious. With Trump potentially in the race, the chances for the party to go off-message greatly increase. He has come to be known as a walking sound bite in GOP circles—unpredictable, flashy, and unafraid of lighting the party's carefully crafted campaign message on fire.

Republicans hoping to avoid having such "eccentric" candidates this time around might be cringing at Trump's continued harping on President Obama's birth certificate, but there's not too much they can do to keep him under wraps. As the Los Angeles Times notes, Trump can more than afford to pay for a run on his own, so he doesn't even need to convince a billionaire megadonor to bless him with primary financing.

Trump's already established a foothold in Washington, where he's converting the historic Old Post Office Pavillion into the greatest hotel in the history of lodging. It's conveniently located on Pennsylvania Avenue, and with luck it will be done in time for President-Elect Trump to stay over while his crews get that old White House down the street looking fancy enough for him to move in.