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Countdown to Armageddon: Judgment Day Is One Month Away

Oh, goodness, it’s April 21. According to the people handing out literature in the Times Square subway station, that means Judgment Day will arrive exactly one month from now. They are the followers of

Harold Camping

, my favorite old radio preacher, the esoteric and somewhat thick-tongued exegete I used to find way up the dial, late in the night, calculating the end of the world.

Harold Camping has practice at picking end dates. Previously, he concluded the date was going to be September 6,

1994.

The world went on. Here’s the

Dilbert

from that day.

But his believers are with him still, as he gazes into the Bible so deeply he sees right on through the words. The words say “But of that day and hour

knoweth no man

, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.” But they do not mean what you think they mean, because on May 21, 1988, “Christ removed the final seal,” the literature explains, opening the book that was previously closed, allowing Harold Camping to

see the day

and the hour.

God used Noah, who was a preacher (2 Peter 2:5) to declare that mankind had seven days or 7,000 years to escape destruction. Since 2011 A.D. is precisely 7,000 years after Noah preached that warning, God has given mankind a wonderful proof that Judgment Day will occur in the year 2011.

Meanwhile, Android phones, like iPhones, are constantly

collecting data about your location

and feeding it to a central database:

In the case of Google, according to new research by security analyst Samy Kamkar, an HTC Android phone collected its location every few seconds and transmitted the data to Google at least several times an hour. It also transmitted the name, location and signal strength of any nearby Wi-Fi networks, as well as a unique phone identifier.

So: Judgment Day is 30 days away.