JamesEdition—the billionaires' version of eBay—is auctioning off a chance to connect with your inner Scrooge McDuck by lounging in a bank vault filled with currency. The vault in Basel, Switzerland, is filled with 8 million real Swiss coins, which works out to roughly $450,000.
Here are some intrepid vault laborers shoveling the money:
Gizmodo thrilled at the JamesEdition listing, saying it would "fulfill every person's childhood (and adult) dream of swimming in money." Sorry to be a killjoy, but as much fun as it sounds, attempting to swim in 15 tons of Swiss doubloons would be extremely painful at best, and potentially life-threatening at worst. (Now, using that money to fill a swimming pool with cornstarch or spaghetti would be a much more reasonable, enjoyable alternative).
We are only human beings, and unfortunately cartoon physics don't apply to us. The Billfold's Matt Powers has put McDuck's wealth at $210 billion—making the Disney 'toon $137 billion richer than Carlos Slim Helú. It's time to accept the fact that Scrooge McDuck will always have it better than we do.
TODAY IN SLATE
The End of Pregnancy
And the inevitable rise of the artificial womb.
Doctor Tests Positive for Ebola in New York City
How a Company You’ve Never Heard of Took Control of the Entire Porn Industry
The Hot New Strategy for Desperate Democrats
Blame China for everything.
The Questions That Michael Brown’s Autopsies Can’t Answer
Kiev Used to Be an Easygoing Place
Now it’s descending into madness.
Don’t Just Sit There
How to be more productive during your commute.