The Amazon Reviews for Samsung's $45,000 TV Are Vicious and Funny

Future Tense
The Citizen's Guide to the Future
Dec. 4 2013 5:24 PM

What Amazon Reviewers Think of Samsung’s $45,000 TV

Samsung 85-inch Smart TV
Samsung's new 85-inch TV gets 4.5 stars on Amazon.com, although it's unclear whether anyone has actually purchased the thing.

Image via Samsung

It has an 85-inch screen, a 120-watt speaker system, and a quad-core processor. And for a limited time, the Samsung UN85S9 85-Inch 4K Ultra HD 120Hz 3D Smart LED TV is on sale for $5,002 off on Amazon.com. Granted, it will still set you back $39,997.99.

Does it get good reviews from Amazon users? Of course it does—if by “good” you mean “brutal.” A few excerpts:

Five stars: “Very satisfied”:
My wife and I bought this after selling our daughter Amanda into white slavery. We actually got a refurbished. It's missing the remote, but oh well-- for $10K off, I can afford a universal, right? The picture is amazing. I've never seen the world with such clarity. …
- James Thach
Five stars: Great Investment!
… Let's just say the Samsung UN85S9 85-Inch 4K Ultra HD 120Hz 3D Smart LED TV looks a lot better on the wall than any college diploma could.
- Anuj K.
Five stars: Simply Amazing
I needed an additional television for my breezeway walking from the side courtyard to the master quarters. Ever since Carlton renovated the Elephant exhibit, I only have the noise of the waterfall and the Harp player outside.…
- pancakewizard
Three stars: Nigerian money right in time!
After I got the $20 million from a Nigerian prince in exchange for assisting him in money transfers (so glad I opened that email), I was looking for a good TV and found this …
- IWon "the Ramesh"
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The reviews aren’t all positive, however.

One star: “So sad”
It makes those abused-animal commercials with the Sarah Mclachlan music playing so much sadder when the one-eyed pug is four feet tall.
- Jon S

You can read all 300-plus reviews here, and Amazon has compiled a list of some classic funny reviews of past products here.

The Samsung Smart TV seems like it would go perfectly with that $500 Denon AKDL1 Dedicated Link Cable, no?

Future Tense is a partnership of SlateNew America, and Arizona State University.

Will Oremus is Slate's senior technology writer.

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