Jimmy Kimmel is taking the week off to spend time with his family after his son’s surgery, but Jimmy Kimmel Live! has continued to air new episodes with a roster of celebrity guest hosts filling in. On Tuesday, Tracee Ellis Ross took the reins and used the opportunity to talk about sexual harassment in the news. “First of all, let’s start with the fact that it isn’t a sex scandal. It isn’t a Hollywood scandal,” she said. “It isn’t even a scandal. It is a systemic problem about the abuse of power that takes place across all industries.”
Since some men seem to be confused about what does or does not constitute harassment, Ross decided to explain it to them in the simplest possible way, using a children’s book that she wrote about—and for—sexual harassers. “There is a guy, with ten long fingers/ creepy glares, and hugs that linger./ If you’re a woman, you’re not a fan./ I speak, of course, of The Handsy Man.”
Ross went on to explain, in rhyme, which behaviors are unacceptable in the workplace and elsewhere, for all the Handsy Men out there:
You may not compliment my butt
You may not call me “ho” or “slut.”
And even if you’re stoned or drunk,
Do not expose me to your junk.
And if I am your employee
Don’t rest your hand upon my knee.
No, I won’t sit on your lap.
I shouldn’t have to say this crap.
That sound you just heard is a dozen publishers picking up the phone to try to snap up the rights.