You don’t have to look at humanity’s entire record of plunder and ruination to know that there’s no justice in the world. You just have to know that David S. Pumpkins became a viral hit, and, if Twitter is any indication, “Chuckie Chocolate the Chocolate Man,” which debuted on this week’s Saturday Night Live, will almost certainly not. Maybe it’s the fact that Tom Hanks is Tom Hanks and Beck Bennett isn’t. Maybe it’s the fact that no matter how committed Bennett is to the character of Chuckie Chocolate, Chuckie Chocolate himself is kind of half-assing it. He’s not even sure if his name is Chuckie Chocolate or Jackie Chocolate or Tommy Chocolate or Steve. The only thing he’s sure of is that everything that happened last week—the gun, the sexual harassment, the firing—was a mistake, but showing up at the office disguised as a 19th-century candy salesman will surely set everything right. And if not, he’s going to pee his pants.
Let’s be frank: This sketch is not to all tastes. It’s weird, it’s not particularly political, it strays into some uncomfortable territory, and if it strikes you as relatable, you should seek help immediately. It’s possible to watch, stone-faced and unmoved, as Chuckie Chocolate’s saga unfolds. But consider this: You will never see a Saturday Night Live cast do a worse job of keeping straight faces than this one does when Bennett sings a chocolate-themed version of “One Week” while trying to stuff candy in Vanessa Bayer’s face. And those folks are professional comedians. They have to know what’s funny! So let it be known, now and forever: Chuckie Chocolate is officially hilarious. Just don’t make a recurring character out of him or anything.
