“Oscar winner Suicide Squad.” Let that phrase roll around in your mouth a little. Savor it as is you would a fine wine or the touch of winter’s first snowflake on your tongue.
With its win for Best Makeup and Hairstyling, this rotting garbage pile of a movie now has a permanent place in Oscar history. In fact, it has one more Oscar than many of the actors and directors whose contributions have enlivened the art of motion pictures throughout its century-plus history but were never recognized with an award for an individual film. (Lifetime achievement awards are nice and all, but they’re basically the academy’s way of making up for an egregious oversight, usually after the artist in question has stopped producing new work.)
Here’s a short list of those poor, benighted souls who may have created brilliant art but, according to the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Science, are at least one Oscar less good than Suicide Squad.
- Alfred Hitchcock
- Stanley Kubrick
- Orson Welles
- Charlie Chaplin
- Buster Keaton
- Fred Astaire
- Cary Grant
- Barbara Stanwyck
- Kirk Douglas
- Greta Garbo
- Marilyn Monroe
- Paul Thomas Anderson
- Wes Anderson
- David Lynch
- David Fincher
- James Dean
- Harrison Ford
- Mia Farrow
- Angela Bassett
- Will Smith
- Annette Bening
- Samuel L. Jackson
- Amy Adams
- Danny Glover
- Robert Altman
- Howard Hawks
- Spike Lee
- Sigourney Weaver
