It’s been a tough week for everyone, with so much stress and bad news that even a good night’s sleep is hard to come by. And yet Monday inexorably approaches, with all its demands; not being well-rested is not an option. So what is to be done? Despite the wonders of the internet age, Slate can’t offer you a drink or a sedative to ease you into your workweek. What we can do is make it a little easier for you to rest your weary head with the help of Michael O’Donoghue, Saturday Night Live’s first head writer and the first person to ever speak on the show. O’Donoghue’s checkered career is anything but soothing, and his celebrity impressions, great as they are, can make people a little tense. But he also wrote bedtime stories. So, as the stars come out and the new week approaches, gather round for some of Mr. Mike’s Least-Loved Bedtime Tales:
“The Little Train That Died”
Jodie Foster had just turned 14 when she was lucky enough to host Saturday Night Live and hear one of Mr. Mike’s bedtime tales. Perhaps the story of the brave steam engine’s perseverance and courage has kept her motivated all these years; perhaps not. Either way, this delightful story is the perfect reminder to stay focused on your goals in the week to come.
“The Blind Chicken”
We all face difficulties in life, but there’s no reason we can’t overcome them, just the way the blind chicken does—with a little help from his friend the duck! You may think this is just a rehash of “Land Shark,” and you may be right. If you think you deserve better, take it up with Mr. Mike.
“The Enchanted Thermos”
Another valuable lesson about friendships and fate: Sometimes the most unexpected people come into your life in your hour of greatest need. If there’s one thing the last week has taught us, it’s that life is full of surprises, just like the magical genie who befriends the littlest Eskimo in this heartwarming tale. So start thinking about all the wonderful things the next week might bring you, and before you know it, you’ll be off to Slumberland. Sleep well!
