Have you looked outside? We may get a foot of snow in New York City. Ditto for Washington, D.C. A train has derailed in Pennsylvania. There is “thundersnow” in Charlotte. I’m not even sure what that is.
None of us are going to work. We’re going to stay in, keep warm, and watch you. For hours. It’s good for us! Not to mention you.
I know you have a whole host of viewing options, but the only thing that will keep us entertained for the amount of time we have to kill is a gripping, twisty drama “designed to be binge-watched,” like, say, House of Cards. And not the first season. We watched that already. It was great! Now we need Season 2. Today.
And what better way to prove the brilliance of your watch-it-whenever, we’re-so-much-better-than-HBO business plan? Now’s your chance, and it might not come again. I hear Amazon’s gaining on you. But give us Season 2 today, and I might forget I signed up for Amazon Prime the other day.
Moments like this require someone who will act. So come on, Netflix. Don’t be useless. I have no patience for useless things.
TODAY IN SLATE
The Right Target
Why Obama’s airstrikes against ISIS may be more effective than people expect.
The One National Holiday Republicans Hope You Forget
It’s Legal for Obama to Bomb Syria Because He Says It Is
I Stand With Emma Watson on Women’s Rights
Even though I know I’m going to get flak for it.
Should You Recline Your Seat? Two Economists Weigh In.
It Is Very, Very Stupid to Compare Hope Solo to Ray Rice
Or, why it is very, very stupid to compare Hope Solo to Ray Rice.
- School District Wants to Censor American History Curriculum to Make It More Patriotic
- U.S. Federal Prison Population Drops for the First Time in Decades
- Conservative Star D’Souza Avoids Jail Time for Illegal Campaign Contributions
- Moderate Chinese Intellectual Sentenced to Life in Prison After Show Trial
In Defense of HR
Startups and small businesses shouldn’t skip over a human resources department.