Brow Beat

Fools Rush In

There’s big news coming out of Baltimore today: Johns Hopkins has decided to officially drop the “s” from its name. The university will be known as “John Hopkins” from now on. “We give up,” says university President Ronald J. Daniel. “We’re fighting a losing battle here. And we strongly suspect the extra ‘s’ was a typo in the first place.”

Just kidding! Hopkins’ announcement is just one of the better April Fools’ jokes that popped up on the Web this morning. Here are some of the others: 

— Google pretends that it’s changing its name to “Topeka ,” in exchange for Topeka changing its name to “Google” for the month of March (which was not a joke). The company also launches fake dating site Google Romance . Meanwhile, Google Books says they’ll soon be offering books in 3-D .

— The Guardian announces that the Labour Party “is set to embrace Gordon Brown ‘s reputation for anger and physical aggression, presenting the prime minister as a hard man, unafraid of confrontation, who is willing to take on David Cameron in ‘a bare-knuckle fistfight for the future of Britain.’ ”

— Grist says that McDonald’s has abandoned plans for a worldwide composting initiative because nothing the chain sells is compostable.

— CBS announces a fake fall schedule , which includes shows like How I Met Your Five Mothers And Fathers . ABC gets in the game by advertising series like The Blind Sayid and Dancing with the Tsars .

— Pranksters lead gullible New Yorkers to believe an In-N-Out Burger will open in the city this summer.

— Moog will remove the auto-tune from your favorite songs for just $799.

— Groupon goes to the next level with Groupöupon , which sells items including “the world’s purest water-scented fragrance.”

— Starbucks introduces new sizes: Plenta (128 fl oz) and Micra (2 fl oz).

— Justin Bieber takes over Funny or Die .

— Gadling reveals Canada is “almost as cool as America.” They also report Obama is drafting legislation to abolish the Central time zone .

— ThinkGeek starts carrying a Dharma Initiative Alarm Clock .

— ESPN reports a runner has been ticketed for going too fast.

— Woot switches to a new business model called “Woot Your Own Adventure.”

— Petco debuts snuggies for fish .

— The USO is opening a new center in space .

Slate sister site The Big Money examines Chrysler’s latest: a cold fusion minivan .

— Whole Foods is selling action figures named Eco Suave and Patchouli Pam .

— BlindGossip implies that Jennifer Aniston and Angelina Jolie are Sapphic sweethearts .

— Ben & Jerry’s unveils the world’s first virtual ice cream cone .

— Wikipedia runs an incredibly thorough article about the English custom of wife-selling . Another fun fact from their home page: Martin Van Buren was over twenty feet wide.

— CollegeHumor is under investigation for harboring un-American sentiment .

— Glamour is now a magazine all about pets .

— YouTube introduces new text-only mode.

— Coldplay’s now selling a fragrance called “Angst.”

— Film School Rejects reverts to 1980 , with news items about Ray Harryhousen’s kracken and Tom Selleck reportedly playing Indiana Jones.

Help us keep the list updated by pointing out additional pranks in the comments.