The XX Factor: Slate women blog about politics, etc...

Rule No. 1 of Public Humiliation: Bring a Date

On The Daily Show last night, Jon Stewart showed footage of a few of Eliot Spitzer's predecessors in the "Parade of Shame,'' who, as he said, were "all following the one simple rule of public humiliation: Bring a date.'' Then Samantha Bee gave us the scene we've all been waiting for: Her real life hubby, Jason Jones, in pearls, standing meekly by as she apologizes, sort of. "Last night I engaged in activity that failed to live up to the high standards I set for myself as a wife. I was with a man—men, a group of men, maybe a lady or two, I don't really remember. Definitely, though, several men. It was a betrayal of my marriage, even if it left me satisfied in a way my husband, who you see next to me, never has...I also want to apologize to our daughter - I think 'our daughter —definitely mine ...''

But killing as this stuff is—and Lewis Black had a funny riff on it, too—each time they cut to footage of the Spitzers at their news conference, it only compounds my feeling that the sight of his dutiful wife is too sad to bear. Over and over, there she is, so mortified she's unable to lift her eyes from whatever piece of paper her louse husband is fiddling with. Doesn't it seem like this was longer than two days ago? My real problem with this scandal is not that it's none of our beeswax, but that I can't get past wanting to bake something for Silda—and then I hate feeling like that, too, because nobody wants pity-inspired sticky buns. In fact, knowing we're all feeling sorry for her is probably the thing she hates most, or OK, second-most, or maybe third. And I totally reject this whole "great men have great appetites" argument—bah, that's what every two-bit cheater who ever took home a waitress told himself. These Luv Guvs just have bigger egos, more of a sense of entitlement, and lots more disposable cash.