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    Teen Sex, In Defense of the Mixed Message

    Posted Wednesday, April 08, 2009 3:22 PM | By Hanna Rosin
    Emily, Jessica, I'd like to stand up for inconsistency. There are many questions that would be settled if the American political dialogue only allowed a box for inconsistent, or ambivalent, or contentedly hypocritical. Abortion, for example. Polls show that most Americans settle at the I'll-shield-my-eyes-for-the-first-trimester-but-no-later position. But our Hardball culture insists on keeping this debate alive into eternity. I think something like that is true for mothers and teenage daughters having sex. This is why I felt Tami's speech on Friday Night Lights was a model in its disappointed, elated, tender ambivalence.

    Tami: So do, you  love Matt?

    Julie: I love matt

    [Tami smiles]

    T: Does he love you?

    J: Matt loves me

    Then she asks about birth control, despite Julie's resistance. Then, through her tears, she says:

    You know, just because you're having sex this one time doesn't mean you have to have it all the time. If ever you feel taken for granted, you can stop anytime. And if you ever break up with Matt, it's not like you have to have sex with the next boy.

    J: Why are you crying?

    T: Because I wanted you to wait. Not just because I wanted to protect you. Because I love you and I want to make sure nothing bad ever happens to you.

     

    God, I tear up just typing it.

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