Tuesday, May 13, 2008 - Posts
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It was Zen Hillary who stepped to the podium tonight after her big win in West Virginia, where she spoke in modulated tones about money, death, and a campaign that may seem eternal but is "just an instant in time.'' Alas, a Clinton supporter named Florence Steen, who was born before women had the right to vote, and "asked that an absentee ballot be brought to her hospice bedside,'' did not live to see Election Day. "Florence passed on a few days ago,'' Hillary announced at her victory party, and the crowd responded, "Awwww ...'' But, she said, Steen's family gave her the parting gift of an "important milestone'' by helping Florence cast a ballot for her. Heavy, for a crowd that came to celebrate, a pitch to historians more than to voters. And the whole dying woman narrative an unexpected choice for someone who's trying to prove her campaign is not on a ventilator.
Even her fund-raising pitch was subdued, and she sounded like an easy-listening version of herself as she hit all the recent talking points, minus any negative mention of Barack Obama. Her supporters at Charleston's Civic Center were on the quiet side, too, and silent as—well, you know—at every mention of her Democratic rival; when she said she and Obama had "always stood together on what was most important'' no one clapped that I could hear. And in the bleachers waiting for the Hillster to arrive, there was considerable disagreement about whether it would be better to stay home on Election Day, or settle for Barack Obama in November if Clinton doesn't get the nomination.
"I won't vote period if she doesn't get it, and I've got a big family and none of them will vote for Obama, either,'' said Carroll Ramsey, who was with his 12-year-old grandson and cast himself as a reverse ageist: "I've been in this old world for 63 years and he doesn't have the experience." The hairdresser sitting in front of him agreed: "I didn't care for all that church stuff with his preacher,'' said Dorothy Chapman, "and really, I don't think he's got enough oomph. He could change my vote, I guess, but he'd have to do some high talkin'.''
"Well, I'm a lesbian,'' said another supporter, Nancy Toney, as heads swiveled, "and these Republicans are not homosexual friendly, so hell yes I would'' vote for Obama in the fall. "I had to go with the woman, but I like both of them.''
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Well, if you're not, go to the playground and look around. One of the three married mommies innocently trailing their little tyke is cheating, according to a new "Sex and the American Mom" survey conducted by Cookie magazine and AOL Body and apparently filled in by 30,000 women. When faced with this statistic, my own (perhaps nervous) husband pointed out that this was a self-selecting survey, answered by people probably attracted by a survey with "affair" in the title. But, then, our own Emily Bazelon says this matches evidence gathered from other scientific surveys and paternity tests. So I guess I have to believe it.
But I, too, would be much more likely to believe that 30 percent of all Cookie-reading moms are having affairs. (And now prepare for a long festering rant about Cookie.) It's not merely that the hot moms of Cookie attend picnics in Italian gowns that cost as much as my laptop or have skinny jeans for every occasion. It's their sense that they deserve to preserve their "lifestyle" exactly as it should be, and God help any chocolate-smeared infant or rumpled husband who stands in their way!
When I first read about Cookie I thought I was the perfect demographic. Those mommy magazines in the ob waiting room always seemed a little sad and frumpy to me, with their tenty maternity clothes and perennial lists of "10 tips" for everything. I was even willing to overlook the fact that Cookie was founded by two hipster New Yorker roommates who didn't even have kids.
Then I picked up an early issue a couple of years ago, and Oh My God. One feature I recall was called something like "You Can Decorate White!" Some poor kid lived in a house with white couches and white side tables and fluffy white rugs. His room was all white, and there was a white model airplane on his bedstand. (Cranberry juice, anyone?) The ads were a marvel and gave the demographic away. Anyone remember that New York magazine feature about the little demon shopper girl—a 6-year-old who seemed to know everything about Marc Jacobs' latest line? Well, every ad was tailor made for her: back to school wear that ranged from $400 shoes to $1,000 plaid miniskirts and made a normal person yearn for JC Penney.
Well, a mom who sends her 6-year-old to school looking like an expensive hooker could certainly not be expected to put up with a little middle-aged husband paunch or to resist the come-on from the hot new Israeli gym teacher.
Back to the main point: Take the survey. If you don't have time, we'll excerpt what we XXers have decided is our favorite question, a decidedly normal one:
Would you rather:
1. Have more sex
2. Make more money
3. Lose ten pounds
4. Get more sleep
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Maybe not in South Carolina, it turns out. You may remember Regina McKnight, who in 2001 was convicted of "homicide by child abuse" for her stillbirth. The state argued that she'd killed her fetus by using cocaine while pregnant. This week, the South Carolina Supreme Court overturned her conviction, saying her public defender failed to do a decent job representing her at trial (or to use the technical term, because of "ineffective counsel")—in part by failing to present medical evidence about the shaky link between the stillbirth and the cocaine use.
This means, I guess, that my sibs and I can't go file criminal charges against our mother for giving us asthma and allergies by smoking while she was pregnant. (Yes, Mom, I know it was way back in the Dark Ages when everyone was doing it. But if everyone was jumping off a cliff, would you jump too??). Alas! The end of personal responsibility is nigh!
But seriously, folks. McKnight was sentenced to 12 years in prison, without parole, for a failed pregnancy. Right now she's still in prison, while the state decides whether or not to appeal. Read more here, here, and here.
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Emily asked a good question yesterday about the proper feminist reading of Hillary Clinton’s weird new Bartleby phase—wherein she is all but mathematically eliminated; superdelegates are running screaming for the exits; the office furniture is being carted out onto the moving vans; and yet still she soldiers on, undaunted, because real women “don’t give up in difficult situations.”
I suppose you can call all this “feminism.” But, as my husband pointed out this morning, if the inability to concede error or defeat—even in light of irrefutable, empirical evidence and in the face of spiraling support and tanking morale—is feminism, George Bush must be the feminist icon of the ages.
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