The Happiness Project: How To Be Happier

Eight Things To Carry When Traveling With Kids

Every Wednesday is Tip Day.
This Wednesday: Eight tips for what to carry when you travel with kids.

In general, I aim to travel light, but I’ve learned over the years that this generally isn't a good strategy as a parent. If anything teaches you the happiness value of preparation, it’s parenthood. The right supplies can mean the difference between misery and good cheer.

If you’re traveling with a baby, of course you need a whole different set of supplies. My children are out of that stage, and now I never go on a trip without at least most of these items:

1. A bag of almonds. These are for me as much as for my children.

2. A bottle of water. (Usually I’m violently opposed to bottled water, but I now concede that it’s good to have a bottle when you travel.)

3. Novelty candy. By this, I mean a candy that’s odd (e.g., Pop Rocks, candy spray) or takes a long time to eat (candy necklace) or fun in some way (Pez). I save this to whip out if my kids get crabby. Chocolate or anything that can melt is a risky choice.

4. Coloring book and markers, but remember to check that the markers aren’t all dried out. Just learned this the hard way. (Spend out! Don’t put a dud marker back in the box. A metaphor for life.)

5. Books.

6. Wipes. Not just for babies anymore.

7. Camera. Remember to charge it. Learned that the hard way, too.

8. We finally caved and bought a portable DVD player. This is a great invention. I actually finished Ken Follett’s The Pillars of the Earth on the plane while my daughters were transfixed by My Neighbor Totoro.

Irrelevant note to entrepreneurs out there: I think the scratch-and-sniff market has been sorely overlooked. Growing up, my sister had a collection of scratch-and-sniff stickers, and we still have fun going through her big pile. The Sweet Smell of Christmas is one of our favorite picture books. Happiness is a great scratch-and-sniff!

* Interested in starting your own happiness project? If you’d like to take a look at my personal Resolutions Chart, for inspiration, just e-mail me at grubin, then the “at” sign, then gretchenrubin dot com. (Sorry about writing it in that roundabout way; I’m trying to thwart spammers.) Just write “Resolutions Chart” in the subject line.

Take a Vacation

I’m working on my Happiness Project, and you could have one, too. Everyone’s project will look different, but it’s the rare person who can’t benefit. Join in—no need to catch up, just jump in right now. Each Friday’s post will help you think about your own happiness project.

The biggest challenge of a happiness project isn’t figuring out what resolutions I should make but actually sticking to my resolutions.

Somewhat to my surprise, I've found that I have quite a lot of trouble keeping my resolutions related to play—that is, the activities I do in my free time, because I want to do them, for their own sake, for my own reasons, and not for money or ambition. To encourage myself to play more, I’ve made resolutions to be serious about play, take time to be silly, force myself to wander.

Believe me, I see the irony in the fact that I work doggedly at fun and am so serious about joking around, but given my nature, I have to measure what I want to manage, and if I don’t commit to having fun, it will get crowded out of my workaholic days. Even so, these resolutions remain a challenge for me.

Writer Jean Stafford scoffed, “Happy people don’t need to have fun,” but in fact, studies show that the absence of feeling bad isn’t enough to make you feel good—you must strive to find sources of feeling good. Regularly having fun is a key factor in having a happy life; people who have fun are 20 times more likely to feel happy.

Starting today, for the next week, I’m going to keep another play-related resolution: Take a vacation. I haven’t stepped away from my blog very many times since I started it more than three years ago, but it’s time for a break.

I've started to feel overtapped—the feeling captured perfectly in Tolkien's The Fellowship of the Ring, when Bilbo says to Gandalf, "I feel all thin, sort of stretched, if you know what I mean: like butter that has been scraped over too much bread. That can't be right. I need a change, or something."

Now I’m off to pack for the beach. I'll be back soon.

* This little video really made me want to learn CGI! Maybe that can be my "novelty and challenge" task for Happiness Project II.

* I send out short monthly newsletters that highlight the best of the previous month’s posts to about 26,000 subscribers. If you’d like to sign up, click here or e-mail me at grubin, then the “at” sign, then gretchenrubin dot com. (sorry about that weird format—trying to to thwart spammers.) Just write “newsletter” in the subject line. It’s free.