Reality can be a hard sell. No matter how much we pray inside our heads, no matter how hard we wish for something, if it defies the laws of physics, it ain’t gonna happen.
But I’m a middle-aged balding bearded white guy, and hearing that from me probably won’t dissuade people who think otherwise.
So maybe hearing it from puppet me will make it easier.
OK, maybe not. But that’s a way more adorable version of me either way (even if the beard looks more like some kind weird veiny zombie thing going on).
This PSA was brought to you by Death By Puppets.
TODAY IN SLATE
One of the most amazing feats in chess history just happened, and no one noticed.
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Here are the facts.
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First, stop thinking of it as “Chinese food.”