I have a billion things to do this weekend, but since today is conspiring to just be silly, I'll just leave this here for you. Click it, and don't forget to hover over the red button at the bottom.
P.S. That's not my real tattoo, though Zach got the location correct.
TODAY IN SLATE
Smash and Grab
Stop Panicking. America Is Now in Very Good Shape to Respond to the Ebola Crisis.
The 2014 Kansas City Royals Show the Value of Building a Mediocre Baseball Team
The GOP Won’t Win Any Black Votes With Its New “Willie Horton” Ad
Sleater-Kinney Was Once America’s Best Rock Band
Can it be again?
Forget Oculus Rift
This $25 cardboard box turns your phone into an incredibly fun virtual reality experience.