Bad Astronomy

A: Ghouls. Q: What do you call psychic mediums?

[Note: the following quotations are from a news website called Palluxo, and so have not been verified. The misspellings in the quotations make me wonder about just how accurate this all is. Certainly, though, given the characters involved, it’s not a stretch at all to think these actions accurately described.]

Maybe not all people who claim to speak to the dead are evil con artists trying to milk any kind of celebrity they can from others in order to make a quick buck or a thousand, but some are.

You can make up your own mind about James Van Praagh, noted cold reader psychic, who (according to the Palluxo news site) claims to have spoken with Michael Jackson the other day:

“Where are you located now, Michael” asked Van Praagh. “I am surrounded by happiness. I never felt more happier,” said Jackson.

When asked about his children, Jackson started crying. “I miss them a lot. I want them to be happy. I will be with them… in their hearts, will be looking over their shoulders.”

That should make the tykes happy, knowing a ghost will be eternally spying on them.

And as if this weren’t bad enough, the article ends with:

More answers from dead Michael Jackson will be revealed on upcoming Oprah Show.

Not to be outdone – or in this case, underdone – Sylvia Brown has jumped on this bandwagon, also according to Palluxo. However, she couldn’t even muster the energy to have any quotations from Jackson. All she had was:

“I asked him to identify himself by moving my desk. The desk started trembling, then it moved a feet or two away from me. He wrote his name on my desk,” she said. “This was Michael’s sign of life.”

So she claims her desk moved? I assume she has video of this, covering different angles, and key unbiased eye witnesses for backup?

Oh, all we have is her word for it? Oh, OK. Well then, let’s hope she’s more accurate here than she was with Shawn Hornbeck.

I’m done here. I need a shower now. Blecchhhhh.

Tip o’ the crystal ball to Tommy Holland via BABloggee James Brown.