Soul proprietor

Soul proprietor

Soul proprietor

Bad Astronomy
The entire universe in blog form
June 29 2009 10:30 AM

Soul proprietor

Some of the secondary and tertiary news sites (the kinds with "Buy your Estonian bride online!" ads) are saying that a bank in Latvia called Kontora will give people loans for up to roughly $1000. Not bad, but the catch? You have to sign over your immortal soul.

First, I think this is a bad deal for them in many cases. I know that as collateral, for example, my soul may not be worth all that much. It's been through a lot and is no longer in mint condition -- more like poor-to-fair, with some tears, and stains... and I'm pretty sure the binding is missing.

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Second, um, how do they collect? I'm sure we've all heard of harassing phone calls and the occasional broken knee from the collection guys. I don't see how this might work though. What kind of extraction tool would they use? A scythe? A golden trump? Beating me with a Pearly Gate?

And third: if they did try to collect, I would declare moral bankruptcy. What can they do? In my case, it's an act of God.

Tip o' the halo to Jamiebb.