The dog ate my steroids.

The stadium scene.
Aug. 2 2005 4:50 PM

The Dog Ate My Steroids

Why athletes fail drug tests, in their own words.

(Continued from Page 1)

"Nobody on the planet could say that I don't love my wife and I don't love my kids. … I have never in my life, nor would I ever, do anything to jeopardize their opinion of me. I don't know what has happened and I don't know how it has happened. I promise everybody I'm going to find out."
—Shot-putter C.J. Hunter, Sept. 25, 2000, after failing four separate tests for anabolic steroids

"I know I did nothing incorrect. ... I take stuff I buy over the counter. Multivitamins, protein shakes, muscle relaxants. That kind of stuff … I'm surprised because look at what kind of player I am. I'm a leadoff hitter. I never hit any home runs."
—Then-Devil Rays outfielder Alex Sanchez, April 4, 2005

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"[My coach] had given me this pill and I had taken it. He told me it was not a steroid and that it would just keep you 'up' so you wouldn't be so fatigued."
—Sprinter Calvin Harrison, after testing positive for the stimulant modafinil (Guardian, Oct. 27, 2003)

"I never intentionally put anything in my body which I thought was illegal. … People think you sit around and stick needles in you, and it's not like that. Seventy percent of the stuff you get at [General Nutrition Center], you test positive for under the policy."
—Cleveland Indians minor leaguer Darnell McDonald (Buffalo News, May 23, 2005)

"She was bringing them from Lithuania for my mother-in-law."
—Cyclist Raimondas Rumsas, July 30, 2002, after his wife was found with EPO and testosterone in the trunk of her car

Josh Levin is Slate's executive editor.

Rachael Larimore is a Slate senior editor.

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