Take Off Those K2 Parkas!

The stadium scene.
Nov. 21 2000 7:00 PM

Take Off Those K2 Parkas!

(Continued from Page 3)

Calling Katherine Harris: If you go to www.nfl.com and click the "Pro Bowl Ballot" line, the section that appears is … confusing! And there's a big disclaimer that says, NOTE: BALLOTS WILL NOT BE COUNTED UNTIL THEY HAVE BEEN REVIEWED AND FORMALLY SUBMITTED. "Formally submitted" to an NFL Properties marketing division? Maybe what Palm Beach County needed was a ballot disclaimer. This makes TMQ wonder, did Bruce Matthews really win his Hawaii trip all those years?

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Fake Kick = Victory: The Bills and Persons ran surprise fake kicks and won; the only trick kick by a losing team was the Saints' last-gasp onside that everyone expected.

Haiku Corner: Here are staff and reader haiku:

Belichick picks Pats
Jets soar, P-People founder
What was he thinking?
TMQ, 2000

Eight won and three lost
Great numbers for "rebuilding"
Marino? Who's he?
Chris Lipe

Weekend sports Sabbath
No Bush/Gore stuff on Sunday
Time for beer and ball.
"James"

Ryan Leaf drops back
Another incomplete? No,
It's intercepted.
"Trace"

In South Florida
Two strange ballots in one week
First the Canes, now this.

—Kevin Carey

Keep submitting your verse to the "The Fray," slugging entries "Football Haiku," "Football Six-Part Cantos," and so on.

Correction of the Year: Actual correction from the New York Times: "The Q&A column in Science Times on Nov. 7 about the mucus that makes frogs' tongues sticky misstated the feeding process of tongueless aquatic frogs. They move food into their mouths with their limbs, not by using water currents." One is left to wonder which frog wrote in to complain about the story. And one marvels that the same newspaper that is so fastidious about correctly characterizing the feeding process of tongueless aquatic frogs is so cavalier about endlessly printing incorrect predictions of exact final NFL scores. Is the New York Times trying to suggest that tongueless aquatic frogs are more important than football?

Hidden Indicator of the Week: Three quarterbacks (Rich Gannon, Rob Johnson, and Kordell Stewart) finished as their teams' leading rushers while a fourth (Shawn King) out-rushed the lead back of the opposition team. This is the sort of hidden indicator that is essential to an insider's understanding of the sport. Unfortunately, Tuesday Morning Quarterback has no idea what it means.

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