Varnish Remover

Gotta Love Those Bolls

The Cotton Club, produced by Rhea & Kaiser Marketing Communications for Rhone-Poulenc.

Sound02 - vrcotton.avi or Sound03 - vrcotton.mov; download time, 3.50 minutes at 56K Sound01 - VR-cotton.asf; for sound only

Not that The Cotton Club is in poor taste, you understand. It is true that it is set to David Rose’s famous “Stripper,” which urges one to “take it off, take it all off”–but the spot’s producers, Chicago firm Rhea & Kaiser, were sharply aware of the Cotton Belt-Bible Belt overlap. “This plant is a dancer, not a stripper,” one of its makers insists.

The setting, however, strikes a coyly sultry note. Red curtains and exaggerated underlighting transform an old German opera house in Brooklyn, N.Y., into “The Cotton Club,” where “a new act” is being staged. “First,” says the voice-over, as the camera curves around a gyrating graphic, “it takes off those leaves. Then, it keeps them from coming back.” We aren’t sure what “it” is, but clearly, this product aids aging. Leaves wither and fall as the plant continues to dance–the combination of potent chemicals and strip clubs isn’t likely to endear itself to the PC police; and there are those who would be hard pressed to distinguish between Finish and Agent Orange. But all’s well, etc., because the stuff in the white bottle opens those bolls–”Man, does it open up those bolls.”

Not that The Cotton Club is in poor taste, you understand. It is true that it is set to David Rose’s famous “Stripper,” which urges one to “take it off, take it all off”–but the spot’s producers, Chicago firm Rhea & Kaiser, were sharply aware of the Cotton Belt-Bible Belt overlap. “This plant is a dancer, not a stripper,” one of its makers insists.

The setting, however, strikes a coyly sultry note. Red curtains and exaggerated underlighting transform an old German opera house in Brooklyn, N.Y., into “The Cotton Club,” where “a new act” is being staged. “First,” says the voice-over, as the camera curves around a gyrating graphic, “it takes off those leaves. Then, it keeps them from coming back.” We aren’t sure what “it” is, but clearly, this product aids aging. Leaves wither and fall as the plant continues to dance–the combination of potent chemicals and strip clubs isn’t likely to endear itself to the PC police; and there are those who would be hard pressed to distinguish between Finish and Agent Orange. But all’s well, etc., because the stuff in the white bottle opens those bolls–”Man, does it open up those bolls.”

To put it another way, the plant takes it all off, then sprouts bolls. Hmm.