Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at Washingtonpost.com.

Real-time discussions with Slate writers.
Nov. 30 2009 2:43 PM

Fiance on the Down Low

Prudie counsels a woman whose partner has secret sex with men—and other advice seekers.

(Continued from Page 3)

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Re: New York: "Whenever I watch my kids ..."

It's called being a parent, not a baby-sitter. Perhaps if you looked at your role as a partnership rather than having it be your wife's responsibility, things would be different. Gee, do you "help out" around the house, too?

Emily Yoffe: It doesn't help a father feel like a partner if the wife is treating him like an incompetent baby-sitter. I don't have any problem with him saying, "Whenever I watch my kids."

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Got Girlfriend Pregnant: Prudie, just a defensive note for clarification: She only "got pregnant" once, and it was despite taking emergency contraception. Point taken, though, about the need for fundamentalism in pregnancy prevention.

Emily Yoffe: I read it as she took emergency contraception once because you both failed to use birth control and thought otherwise she might get pregnant. Then the actual pregnancy came later. So, yes, I'm wrong and there weren't two pregnancies—but it was a whole lot of sex without a whole lot of birth control.

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I Only Eat Local = Pseudo-Intellectual Dimwit: RE: New Zealand apples. Does this woman realize that 1 in 8, that's 1 in 8 Americans, are on food stamps? She needs to shut her trap and be thankful.

Emily Yoffe: As we march toward the rest of the holidays, yes, it's a good idea not to tell people how destructive and offensive their well-intentioned gestures of good will are.

Have a good week, everyone. Talk to you next Monday.

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