Dear Prudence answers readers' questions live at

Real-time discussions with Slate writers.
Nov. 30 2009 2:43 PM

Fiance on the Down Low

Prudie counsels a woman whose partner has secret sex with men—and other advice seekers.

(Continued from Page 3)


Re: New York: "Whenever I watch my kids ..."

It's called being a parent, not a baby-sitter. Perhaps if you looked at your role as a partnership rather than having it be your wife's responsibility, things would be different. Gee, do you "help out" around the house, too?

Emily Yoffe: It doesn't help a father feel like a partner if the wife is treating him like an incompetent baby-sitter. I don't have any problem with him saying, "Whenever I watch my kids."


Got Girlfriend Pregnant: Prudie, just a defensive note for clarification: She only "got pregnant" once, and it was despite taking emergency contraception. Point taken, though, about the need for fundamentalism in pregnancy prevention.

Emily Yoffe: I read it as she took emergency contraception once because you both failed to use birth control and thought otherwise she might get pregnant. Then the actual pregnancy came later. So, yes, I'm wrong and there weren't two pregnancies—but it was a whole lot of sex without a whole lot of birth control.


I Only Eat Local = Pseudo-Intellectual Dimwit: RE: New Zealand apples. Does this woman realize that 1 in 8, that's 1 in 8 Americans, are on food stamps? She needs to shut her trap and be thankful.

Emily Yoffe: As we march toward the rest of the holidays, yes, it's a good idea not to tell people how destructive and offensive their well-intentioned gestures of good will are.

Have a good week, everyone. Talk to you next Monday.

And become a fan of Prudieon the official Dear Prudence Facebook page.


Medical Examiner

The Most Terrifying Thing About Ebola 

The disease threatens humanity by preying on humanity.

I Bought the Huge iPhone. I’m Already Thinking of Returning It.

Scotland Is Just the Beginning. Expect More Political Earthquakes in Europe.

Students Aren’t Going to College Football Games as Much Anymore

And schools are getting worried.

Two Damn Good, Very Different Movies About Soldiers Returning From War

The XX Factor

Lifetime Didn’t Think the Steubenville Rape Case Was Dramatic Enough

So they added a little self-immolation.


Blacks Don’t Have a Corporal Punishment Problem

Americans do. But when blacks exhibit the same behaviors as others, it becomes part of a greater black pathology. 

Why a Sketch of Chelsea Manning Is Stirring Up Controversy

How Worried Should Poland, the Baltic States, and Georgia Be About a Russian Invasion?

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