This Ain't Nightline
Ted Koppel's embarrassing debut as a Times columnist.
I've been watching Cheryl Mills, an attractive young black woman who is deputy White House counsel, deliver her defense of the president on the floor of the Senate this afternoon. It is her task to contradict the charges of obstruction of justice. I find her performance pretty banal.
Pioneer Ted checks in on Page 8, where Jim O'Grady listens.
(I'm not altogether sure how the coal was employed, since it was not to produce hot water or heat in our rooms. Indeed, not only were our rooms not heated in the winter, we were required to leave the windows open.)
Annie Ronen discovers Ted channelling Andy Rooney on Page 28:
The problem with the one-cent stamps is that they're so cheap the stickum on the back doesn't work; they keep falling off the envelopes. So I took a batch of our thirty-two-cent stamps to the post office this morning, hoping to trade them in on an equal number of thirty-threes and just pay the difference. Of course, I expected an argument.
Louis Rios finds Ted going Masters and Johnson on us on Page 60.
Nature's message to men and women "of a certain age" would seem to have a certain harmonious foundation. After all, vaginal dryness and erectile dysfunction are clearly intended to comfortably coexist.
Laura McMasters reveals the "literal" Ted on Pages 75 and 146:
A Huey helicopter just flew by over the Gulf of Mexico. It has been thirty years some I listened for that sound in Vietnam, thirty years since it meant the imminent arrival of food and water and, often, safety. The sound and the memory of what it once meant still makes me salivate, literally.
Father's Day. Larry and Deirdre have brought Jake down to spend a week with us. It is literally mind-blowing how jet travel whisks one overnight from a war zone in the Balkans to a diaper pad in southern Maryland.
Christopher Truffer notes Ted's skills at jump-cutting from one scene to another on Page 5:
Anyway, the world's in a mess, weapons of mass destruction abound and we haven't a clue how we would respond to a chemical of biological attack against one or more of our cities.
God it's beautiful outside. I think I'll go sailing.